A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My family are planning on moving house but I don't want to. Mainly because I am with a girl I know I could spend the rest of my life with, but we've both agreed that we mean so much to each other, a long-distance relationship wouldn't work.What should I do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (16 January 2008):
 You could consult with your parents over this issue.I am sure they will find a away to help you with this problem.Maybe it is time for you to strut out to be independent of your family.
A
female
reader, always.you  +, writes (16 January 2008):
 well if you are an adult than you dont have to go with them
but if you have to if you can drive drive to see her all the time well how far apart is it?
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A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (15 January 2008):
How separated will you two be? At your ages, a significant separation will probably harm, and perhaps kill, your relationship. Older couples with a more solid foundation of shared experiences are much better positioned to survive, or even grow, through a separation that has a forseeable endpoint. (In other words, I don't think the examples from "birdynumnums" apply very well to your situation.)
As a parent of grown kids (and, having been 18 once myself!) I know that relationships at your age are often not enduring. But I also know that some people meet their life partners as young as 15 or 16 and have stable, fulfilling, marriages of many decades. I haven't figured out how to tell which couple will last and which will break up, but I'd sure hate to think that I caused my kid to miss such a one-in-a-lifetime chance.
How do your parents, and her parents, view your relationship? Can you talk to both parents as adults to adults? I'm a little concerned that "... it's not as though we want to see each other every day ... it's that we need to ..." - this sounds like something still in an infatuation stage. A (much) older adult who is closer to you two can give a better evaluation.
If mature third-parties (especially your parents) agree that you and your G/F have a mature, solid relationship they may be more supportive than you imagine. You may be emotionally and (at least in the U.S.) legally able to live semi-independently of your parents. Do you have the means to support yourself, at least food, rent, and incidental expenses? In some cases, parents have been known to provide housing for boyfriends or girlfriends - subject, of course, to the "house rules". These are options you may wish to explore.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (15 January 2008):
 Honestly, it's worth a try! How far apart will you be? What are the circumstances? Can you visit each toher? Will you have the opportunity or the funds? What's the worst that could happen, break up now or break up later?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2008): i moved out of home wen i was 17
whats stopping u not going with ur parents and staying behind?
I moved half way across the country to live with my bf and we're stil going strong, personally i think proper love is worth fighting for
xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe have doubts because we're quite dependent on each other, and we don't particularly want that to change. We're one another's best friends, and it's not as though we want to see each other every day (although of course we do) it's that we need to.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums +, writes (15 January 2008):
My husband lived in Amsterdam for 16 months when we had a 12 year old and a 14 year old. He lived in Toronto for 4 months when we had a 2 year old. He lived in London when I was living in the Netherlands with a 14 year old. We've been married for 30 years. I'm sure that we love each other the same way that you two do. So, what about it won't work? If we could manage, I'm sure you can! Never say never!!!
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