A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Been sleeping with ex for almost 2 years. He's married. I said to him "when you get divorced we can spend more time together". He said, "you'll find someone" I said so will you, since he's been saying he's getting divorced. He responded, "I have someone" Should I just walk away and forget him?
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male
reader, Over 50 advice +, writes (29 May 2015):
 thank you all for your input!! I greatly appreciate it!! I am walking away. Just remain friends maybe talking on phone once in awhile, but no more sex!!!
Sure you can stay in contact with this guy and carry on as friends and everything will be fine? Not quite, if you continue to leave this door open for conversation and to see how he is doing you will never move on. Don't be his back up and you need to think more of yourself. He is using you and your in some other world thinking this is all good.
Cut him off and find someone that is single!!
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 May 2015):
 "I'm getting divorced" in this case is code for "sleep with me until you figure out i'm never leaving my wife for you"
yes time to end it with your married lying lover.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2015): thank you all for your input!! I greatly appreciate it!! I am walking away. Just remain friends maybe talking on phone once in awhile, but no more sex!!!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2015): You're never going to get any more from him because he's already getting all he wants from you.
He's never going to divorce his wife because he stands nothing to gain and too much to lose.
If you are content being his back alley mistress until he tires of you (or trades you in for a younger model) or his wife forces the issue then by all means continue being his piece on the side.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2015): Yes - he's letting you down gently. Although why you chose to have an affair with a married man in the first place is beyond me! Firstly it's morally wrong & secondly - you only end up heartbroken.
He obviously told you he was getting a divorce to keep you interested. Now that he sees you are there for the long haul & not just a quick fling - he's trying to tell you that he already has someone who 'isn't' you!
Leave married men to their marriage.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (26 May 2015):
 WHY, WHY, WHY... do women think that they can f*ck themselves in to a guy's heart....
BULLETIN: Ladies.... once we (men) have you putting out for us.... ALL OTHER SOCIAL NICETIES ARE "OPTIONAL"!!!!!!!
Drop this guy, now... and get on with your life.....
Good luck.....
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A
male
reader, Garbo +, writes (26 May 2015):
 Walk away. There is nothing there for you. You should not have had anything to do with a married man but it is never too late to rectify that. Do not fall for his sweet word, if he sends them to persuade to keep you. He may use sweet to convince you to keep having sex with you. The whole intent of why married men cheat in the first place is just to have sex and nothing more. Congratulations on your strength to pull away from the trap.
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A
female
reader, DaniellaTheLifeCoach  +, writes (26 May 2015):
Hi! We all have different values; deep down, do you really feel that it’s acceptable for you to be a married man’s mistress?
The reality is that it’s easy to tell your mistress that you plan to divorce as it can keep her hanging on; make her feel special that he will leave his wife for her. He is having his cake and eating it - you are allowing him to do this as long as you stick around. If you don’t walk away, how long will you wait? Remember, a divorce can take years.
Even if you do end up having a relationship post divorce, you may need to be on your guard...you already know that he has it in him to cheat because he’s doing it with you now. I have raised a few questions to help you reach your decision, I hope this helps. Take care and best of luck.
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A
female
reader, Euphoria30  +, writes (26 May 2015):
Dear OP,
"You'll find someone" translates into: You'll find someone else than me. He also told you he already has someone.
He couldn't be any clearer. He's saying that if you keep sleeping with him, it's 100% your own risk of breaking your heart, because he clearly stated he will stay where he is and doesn't want to spend more time with you than this.
He won't get divorced and if you choose to hope for it, after what he just said, you are fooling yourself. Deep down, you know better than that, right?
It won't be easy to walk away, but after you've gotten out of the pain, you'll find it was worth it.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 May 2015):
 Yes, walk away.. you have already wasted 2 YEARS being his "dirty secret" or F-buddy... WHY waste more time on him? He is not going to divorce her.
Cut the contact 100%. And next time, don't have a sexual relationship with a guy who is "taken" (Either married or dating someone else). Why settle for these left overs?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2015): Yes...
He's married? He obviously is just using you and has no intention of getting divorced. He's told you himself, find someone else!
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