A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I first started dating this guy a month ago. Before we went out, I really liked him and was so happy when he asked me out. 2 weeks on and I suddenly believed we were in love. However last week the feelings started to fade a little and weren't so strong, I decided to sleep with him to re-kindle the flame however it lasted 10 minutes max and didn't make me feel good at all. Now everyday I wish my strong feelings come back, I have moments where I think I love him but they last about 5 minutes. What should I do? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2012): "What should I do?"
Stop hopping into bed with strangers you barely know but with whom you somehow believe you're "in love."
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2012): You are lucky it has only been two weeks and not longer. Now you know. It's not working out. Let him go and get on with it and with the rest of your life. Maybe you'll find somebody else soon.
...............................
A
male
reader, Uncle PJ +, writes (17 April 2012):
If you feel that you're not feeling for him any more then you should end it. It isn't fair on you or him to continue a relationship that is perceived to be going anywhere.
But if you feel that there is something worth fighting for then give it another couple of weeks and see how it goes. Maybe try to think about what may have changed since you started dating and not. If there is something you feel that may have changed, maybe try and bring it back to try and restore this lost feeling.
It comes down to how you feel at the end of the day. But if you don't really feel for the guy then it's not fair on him to continue this relationship. Otherwise, keep fighting and hope that something comes back in a few weeks. Good luck and whatever you decide, you must be sure on.
...............................
A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (17 April 2012):
That's interesting... only a short time into the relationship and your feelings are starting to fade? A quick question... Do you seem to get relatively bored when you're in a relationship? Or is it just this particular one? If it has happened a few times before, then you first need to analyze yourself. Figure out why you tend to lose interest so early on... and what can be done on your part to change that behavior.
I think also that when you two were intimate it didn't seem as good (even though it was only 10 minutes) because your feelings were already going on a downward spiral. It didn't FEEL special. Therefore, your relationship has lost that "new car smell". In other words, it lost the excitement, the intrigue, the spark.
So what's the solution? Communication.
Talk with him and let him know how you feel. Try to figure out together how you both can make the relationship better.
Here's an article that may be beneficial for you to read:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-its-important-to-keep-your-relationship-exciting.html
And before I go let me say this... All relationships will go through a period where things may seem a bit stale, repetitive, or less exciting. But that shouldn't mean you should love a person less. What you feel for that person (barring any big issues or problems that creates a damper in your relationship) should be ongoing through good times or bad... exciting times or slow. If you really want to be with someone, try to figure out how to make things work.
...............................
|