A
female
age
36-40,
*oxievixen
writes:I and my boyfriend started the relationship bout 6months ago. Its been the best feeling ever. I love him so much aand he says he loves me too. He says my attitude stinkks whereas, he's is worse. Everytime he does something wrong and I react, he'll ignore me till I beg and beg. Recently, we had an argument, I was upset bout something and I didn't want to talk bout it at dt moment, he then asked who uppset me and I tld hm it waznt imprtnt that I didn't want to talk bout it. Before I knew what was goin on, he said 'good night, call me up when u pick up some manners' that only excaltated the anger in me. I told him to grow up and call me up when he's thnkin straight. Aftr that, he ignord me all thru. I had to beg nd beg before he even sd a word to me. He said I'm stress and he doesn't want stress in his life. I begged him for about a week but he said nothing. I tld him its apparent he's made up his mind and I wouldn't stress him about it anymore. Iv not said anything to him since then, its 2weeks now and he's not said anythn. I love him and I know he did love me but right now I'm confused, I don't understand what's goin on Reply to this Question
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female
reader, foxievixen +, writes (23 September 2011):
foxievixen is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank u all for d advice. I really do appreciate it.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (23 September 2011):
 What's going on is that you are getting out of an abusive relationship.
make a list for yourself
one column all the PROS of staying with this man.
the next column all the CONS of staying with this man
make your choice based on that
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (23 September 2011):
I'm glad you do. You've done nothing wrong. At all. This is just about some guy on an ego trip. You shouldn't accept this kind of person in your life. They're not worth the hassle.
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A
female
reader, foxievixen +, writes (23 September 2011):
foxievixen is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks caring guy, I really do feel good after reading this.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (23 September 2011):
When you have to beg a man to talk after he's done something wrong, you need to dump that man.
This relationship isn't based on anything other than his lust for power over you. You say he loves you. Yet in the next sentence, you go on to say that he thinks you're attitude stinks. Following that, you say every time he does something wrong and you get upset, he just runs away until you beg and beg for him to come back. That's not a man, that's a coward who enjoys you humiliating yourself so his ego can feel better. He clearly has absolutely no understanding of who you are, and to be honest it's kind of creepy that when you make it clear you're not ready to talk, he just accuses you of not having manners then becomes a hypocrite by not talking for a few weeks.
In actual fact, you're being emotionally abused. There's even a term for what he's doing to you - stonewalling. He does something wrong, but blames you then doesn't talk to you about it. Instead you have to beg, and all he does it take pleasure in ripping you apart a bit more by not talking about it.
The time has come for you to realize that this is not your problem, and that this man doesn't love you. He just loves himself and gets off on knowing you're hurting and he's the cause of it. He enjoys your pain, and you need to be away from someone like that.
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A
male
reader, cian  +, writes (23 September 2011):
 He's left you, and it's time to move on.
Unfortunately, its really hard to rebuild respect, trust, and honest communication when you clearly are still very emotional about this issue and unable to see it with rational eyes. He doesn't want a piece of that baggage.
Once you are rationally seated, and can think about it clearly, I'd doubt you'd take him back if you swapped shoes.
But no need to worry! When you are 22-25, there's lots of time left and fish in the sea.
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