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female
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*ubblyblonde
writes: I have been with my partner for nearly 17 years. He has allways been flirty, but in the last few years he has been going down to our local and talks to the bar staff. If I asked to go with him I am usually sat there on a bar stool watching him. Last week he was invited to go to another pub by 4 of the girls. I turned up at our local before he had left. He told me he had an invite out, but he did not go. When I got home I asked him if he wanted to split up with me? He said no. I said I was very lonely and wanted someone who liked to be with me. He said it was only a drink. I said I don't suppose I was invited. He said I could come if I want. On Sunday I was expecting him home for dinner and he arrived home 2 hours late. I said I take it you had a better offer he said he was chatting to his mates. He says he has not been unfaithfull to me. In many ways I would find it easier to take if he had a one nighter with someone rather than this. If I mention his name to the girls they say he is a darling and is great fun. I then think I am over reacting or over sensitive. I try to joke about it but it still upsets me. He is 12 years younger than me , but still old enough to be their father! Should I stay or should I go?
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female
reader, Tine  +, writes (1 September 2006):
 i think you should stay, 17 years is an awful long time and it does only sound as though your partner is only trying to go out and do different things. You should trust him and go along with his decisions to get out of the house and do differnt things and just because he is doing this you shouldnt think that he is meeting different women because i guess all he really is guilty of is wanting to be in a different crowd. If all the women in the bar know that you are his partner then chances are that he is only having a laugh with them and treating them like any of his mates.You should take a step back and think, why should he cheat after this long??Why not try going out with him just one night and see what its like for yourself. You both dont have to be stuck to each other 24/7 so if hes going out with his friends why dont you go out with yours??
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