A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've done something really silly and need advice. My boyfriend and I went to one of her really well off friend's house parties the other night and I got really really drunk. Recently I've been waking up the realisation I have a bit of an alcohol problem and believe me, I am seeking help. This is not about that so please don't tell me I need help with alcohol - I already know and am addressing it. One of my problems with alcohol is when I have too much I do things that are out of character. It's like I become a different person. The next day I always look back and think why did I even do that? At the house party we all put our coats and bags on a bed upstairs. At the end of the evening I went to go get my coat and bag. I don't know why I did it. I was really drunk. But in the room was this friends make up collection sitting on a dresser. She had this pot full of lipglosses. I don't know what possessed me but I grabbed a load of them and put them in my bag. I took about 5 - none of them expensive, just standard lip-glosses. I know that doesn't make it better but I'm just trying to say that it's not like I took them because they were expensive. I just took them without thinking. Nobody saw me and nobody knows what I've done. Now in the cold light of day I'm wondering what I should do next. There is no way of me putting the lip glosses back. I don't know if she will even notice. Nobody has said anything. Part of me thinks I should just keep quiet, use this as a turning point for realising why it's so important I get help for my alcohol abuse and move on from it. I know I've done wrong. I feel very sorry. But feel if I were to admit what I've done, it would blow up. Help. What should I do? I don't know why I did it. It was so silly.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2014): Ive gotten drunk and done silly out-of-character things myself. Sober, I'm a really generous person, so if it was me in this situation, I would find a way to apologize that she can appreciate. Like, tell her and give her a twenty to beyond replace the lip glosses and let her know that you were just pissy drunk. Hopefully she can laugh and say she understands as much as me and you do, if she's at all cool. People tend to appreciate a person who can "man-up" when they do something they shouldn't have done, as well as make up for it without being expected to. There's nothing like putting your pride aside to be honest and earn forgiveness, especially in a matter that seems so petty! It's hard some times, but it's a respectable habit to build and you sound like a person who wants to do right so you should.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (2 January 2014):
 I agree with Darrell - give them back, OWN your actions. Stop hiding behind the alcohol.
Isn't it about time you take responsibility?
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A
male
reader, Darrell Goodliffe +, writes (1 January 2014):
 I think you should admit it because I see this as part of the work your doing with your alcohol problem. My understanding is that people use alcohol as an emotional crutch sometimes to effectively run away from problems, nothing entirely bad about that really its natural but when it spirals out of control thats when you get dependant on alcohol.
When you own up you are probably going to feel like crap but id like to think your friend can be understanding enough to see your regret and see this for what it is, a silly mistake which you deeply regret. I think if you dont do something about this it is going to eat you up inside and it will just end up exploding.
Finally, I would suggest maybe raising this with whoever is helping you with your alcohol problem, maybe they have another insight to bring to the table. However, I do feel that ultimately this one would be better if you just confessed and I think in the long run to do so would be a healthy step along the road to recovery. Good luck whatever you choose to do x
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