A
male
age
41-50,
*pyro1983
writes:ok so here goes, im a 24 yr old male who since his last gf nearly 4 yrs has not been with a female and i suffer such low confidence that its a vicious circle of telling myself im not good enough and nobody will want me. I feel invisible and just dont know how to start talking to women or anything even though wheb i was young it was easy im in a mess, can anyone help?
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male
reader, spyro1983 +, writes (9 December 2007):
spyro1983 is verified as being by the original poster of the question thanks for your reply guys, i guess its more of a feeling of being inadequate as my last relationship ended with me finding my gf cheating and now i think iv linked that in my head to me. i will keep you updated thanks for taking your time to help me.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2007): to answer your question, it sounds like your biggest problem is your lack of confidence. women love men who are confident. in my own experience,the more confident you are, the more women will look at you. i was exactly the same way once, doubting myself all the time, but once i got my confidence up, just walkiing around i could notice girls giving me that "special look". even if you are not confident, look like you are. you could try changing your appearance a little, too, that also sometimes works.
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A
male
reader, Dr. John  +, writes (9 December 2007):
 Yes, as a matter of fact I had the same trouble when I was your age. So I thought.
I had very little self confidence especially around women.
However, my brother was more than happy to point out that I always seemed to have a girl on each arm.
He still points that out with what seems to be a little jealousy.
After a bit of self examination I realized that perhaps I did have girls flocking around me.
I had always felt that I was a little less than average looking.
However, what seemed to draw them to me was the way I treated them.
I am a kind natured guy and I always treated them nicely. I opened doors for them, gave them a warm smile, complimented them on how nice they looked, how I liked their perfume or how I liked their hair.
Women like these things because they like to be noticed.
Think about it, even us guys like to be noticed once in awhile don't we?
As far as the fear you are feeling, run toward it and meet it head on. If you face your fears in such a way you will build your self confidence because you will find that it isn't as hard as you think. Give it a try. Doc
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A
female
reader, bqagirl2692 +, writes (9 December 2007):
 First of all, you must breakdown that wall that has blocked you from moving on with your life and giving love another try. Just because we have one failure in our lives does not mean it will repeat itself and make a continuity of events. Forget about your ex gf, forget about the last failed relationship, forget about your past, think about your present and look into the future. Im sure there is one woman out there who will be willing to appreciate your love and hand her's in return. Be positive and dont be so hard on yourself. Move on and live the most out of life. You'll eventually find someone else. Good luck!
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