A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi!!I'm new here and i'm not sure how to ask, but well, i've been with my 1st boyfriend for almost 6 months and we want to start having sex, but we are both very worried about unwanted pregnancies and we don't feel save using just condoms during sex, he wants me to start taking the pill (and i want to do it too), but i'm too scared to tell my mother i want to start having sex and i want to use protection because she thinks i'm not mature enough for that, i'm 18 years old, but she's very protective with me. I've considered the idea of going to a doctor by myself but its impossible for her not to notice as she would not let me out without permission and of course telling her exactly where i'm going and what i'm doing.The first thing i want to ask is if condoms are save enough and if i could just use them without any other form of birth control ( or at least for a while until i start taking the pill)The second thing is that i don't know how to make my mom let me do more stuff, she doesn't even let me hang out with my friends or my boyfriend outside college, I know she's just worried for me, but still, i'd like a little more of freedom and i don't know how to get itPlease, forgive me for my spelling, english is not my first language
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condom, her ex, the pill Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2011): Hi!! Just wanted to say thanks for your answers, they were very helpful, I'm going to talk about this with my mother and tell her I'm not a baby and stop worrying so much about condoms, thanks again!! :)
A
male
reader, dominic pusel  +, writes (30 July 2011):
 at 18 and mom still checks you as though you were 13 is a little embarassing, make you mom understand that a 18 you should take some decisions on you own without her consent. But as it concern sex, your mom is a better person to confide in, sex is not something you should venture into blindly.. Please play safe be wise.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (30 July 2011):
 Condoms are reasonably safe if you use them responsibily. You can also buy spermicide creams that kill sperm. These are able to be purchased from a chemist of drug store.
Make sure you have a practice with putting a condom on before you actually use them during sex. A banana is a good practice tool. May sure you squeeze the tip of the condom before starting to roll it down because trapped air can cause it to pop.
If you do end up going to the doctor he or she must adhere to confidentiality so your mother can't be told about your visit by them. I never told my mother I was sexually active it was just not something I could discuss with her. Even now I am 38 and happily married with 3 children and I wouldn't talk about sex with her.
All the best enjoy sex with your BF and have fun.
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