A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hey. I'm gonna be 32 in a few months and I've just found out I am pregnant. As soon as I told my bf about it he just walked away. I have no family as my mum died a few years ago and my dad in an evil man and we're not on speaking terms. I have very few friends. On the other hand, for some reason I'm really excited about this baby, I have no financial concerns, I own my house and I have a good job. My problem is that I'll be raising this kid completely alone, with no help whatsoever, from day 1. I will walk out of the hospital then I will be on my own- literally on my own. Has any of your ladies ever been a single mother with no family help at all? Was it manageable? Did you make it alright? Do you regret it? Do you think I will make it? Thank you for sharing your experience with me. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, natasia  +, writes (7 June 2012):
 You will be fine - you will have family - your baby!! It will be wonderful, amazing, great ... honestly. Time with just you and your child alone is really precious and perfect. It is probably easier than with other people interfering, having their opinions, etc!
I am so glad you are having this baby ... this is the start of your new family. Really, be happy, and enjoy this ... now you will have someone as dear to you as your mother. It is great news.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2012): There's not reason why you can't! I have a baby and I do have a fiance, but I dont have much family or friends to help out, I would say though, when you see the midwife, to ask her about groups in the area, n you might meet some women in the same shoes as you :) As money's not an issue maybe you should try looking for a professional Nanny to help out on some days to give yourself a rest.
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A
female
reader, Beatriceandjohn +, writes (26 May 2012):
Well... I'm with the baby's dad in a relationship but it's pretty much like bei g a lone parent... He doesn't get too involved in my sons daily life at all and I moved to the uk fom Spain two years ago although I haven't met any friends at all. His family is not helpful and do not help with the baby so, literally, I am on my own.... But you know what having my son is giving me the strength I need to move forward in life and I wanna fight for him... Be strong everything will be just fine
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2012): I ended up being a single parent beginning when my youngest daughter was 3 months old and I had a 2.5 yo as well...their father and I split up and divorced thereafter...not what I planned, but it happened. They are now 20 and 18 ...one heading back to college as a junior in the fall and the other heading off for her first year of college....I had parents, but they lived 900 miles away and my sisters and brothers were scattered everywhere in various states with their own families and lives...so no, I did not have any family or help and I made it work.
what I noticed was pretty much going it alone until my kids were of preschool and school age...that's when I met other parents and the kids made friends and we often took turns letting the kids play together and did sleep overs so we got to have time to ourselves or to be able to go out....even on dates eventually! :-) I did have friends, but I did not impose or even thought to ask them to help me.
Their father started off being involved, but eventually it all faded out until he didn't see them at all and that transpired within two years.
You can do it, because you have to ....people often asked me how I did it...well, because I had to....I raised them myself and they are both doing well. I kept my house, worked two full time jobs at one point for 7 years and just did what I had to do to make it work. I saved money, I never sponged on the government, kept my credit in good standing, made many sacrifices, learned to live without stuff that it turned out I didn't need anyway, and even took family vacations each summer on a budget. It was not always perfect and there were many, many stressful times in my life, but it all worked out and was all worth it to see my daughters grow up and ready to go out into the world as independent adults....my youngest's daughter's high school graduation was as important for her as it was for me...because *I* did it and I did it alone....all the parent teacher conferences, finding ways to split myself in half, sports, academic this and that, keeping them out of trouble...etc. etc., etc...
It can be done, lots of women find themselves in these kind of situations...you can fold and fall apart or you can stand tall and do whatever it takes to make it work. Best of luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2012): I myself am 23 with two young children, i do have my boyfriend and family, however i have a few friends one inparticular that went through the same thing. Granted she struggles financially, she does take care of her child on her own. And does very well, even though there are certainly hard times, she doesnt regret it for a second. If you can i would try to join a moms group and branch out to meet some people that can help and support you because eventually you will need help and time for yourself. I would encourage you to do what you feel is right. I mean its a baby, how can u not be happy lol. Best wishes to you.
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A
female
reader, xAx +, writes (25 May 2012):
 My mum had me when she was 20 and was on her own, with a rubbish job and living with family. She wasn't getting anywhere so she moved to England, learnt the language, studied and work while raising me and she did it well. You're in a much better situation than her so I think it will be fine. However, I would suggest finding a man as I've lacked a good father figure and it feels like a part of me is missing.
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