A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I am 41 years old and married. i am having an afair with a 25 year old person. he is of lower financial class than I . i have a child that i adore. i want to stop this afair and i can not sometimes i dream of being with this guy for ever but i know i can not. how do i stop loving him or it is really love? sometimes i think is the sex. sex is the besti have tried to stop this but i can not every time i tell him is over he looks for me and tells me he loves me and bagges to be toguether. my lover tells me he wants to marry me etc, i give in. i change my phone and he comes to my office looking for me and tells me not to live him please etc and we ended up making love and here we go again. I have explained to him that i am depresed and can not hurt my child and that it would never work because of our age, social staus and culture but he does undrustand and i can not say no i think i have an addiction. there is no way i could divorce my spouse for our child, My child loves her father so much. To make things bad my husband is my partner on several business and we make a great team and really he is a great guy. I need help please help me i never dream in a million years this would happened to me and only because i had a little to drink one night
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2009): Thanks so much for your advice. It is hard so i am going away for 4 days with my family and told him i am going to Paris for 2 months so i will do my best not to call him. I am taking no cell phone. Thank you!!!!
A
female
reader, Ich_liebe_dich  +, writes (24 November 2009):
 God this is really hard situation. hmmm.. i think this is about getting exciting to side kick relationship, plus emotion plus he is young plus sex plus diffirent kind of fun. partly maybe there is love too. you love him because he is the exciting to the now, but with your husband you love him because he is your real love plus child. what ever advice you get' there is only one way to stop it.
you have to make a decision. this is it. you have to make a point right now. if you really wanna stop it before its too late, you have to do it NOW. just like one sentence put a point on it. its hard to stop it if you dont cut off every little things that communicating to him. cut it off" and dont talk to him until you feel to your self that you already can manage to control your emotion. i really wish you good luck, because this is really a hard part to the heart of women, you must be strong for the sake of your family now. and you will be strong. you will make it. take care there..
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2009): You certainly do not want to accept responsibility for your predicament. You sought him out, you enticed him and you have had sex with him and continually want to keep doing it but now you have realized that he is not as worthy of you because he is poor and clingy and it wasn't really you at the time as you were overcome by a "little to drink one night". You are not addicted, you are confused because you have made a bad decision and do not really want to extricate yourself from the "best sex" or accept responsibility.Face the music, lady. If you want to kill this affair end it right now and deal with the repercussions. You have cheated your child and your husband and you did it because you wanted to do it come hell or high water. You felt entitled to it for who knows whatever reasons and now you need to face yourself and deal with what is missing in your relationship with your husband.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2009): Thank you!
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A
female
reader, Miss Karma Louise  +, writes (23 November 2009):
yes drink is a very dangerous thing my love.
however you must tell this bloke that you were drunk when you met and you have no real feelings towards him..
even though you might have,
say your family are getting suspicious..
tell him you have a had fun but you husband is the one you love and that if he ever needs a freind your there for him.
best i can do sorry..
good luck
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