A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My question is not a very long. But my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a month. And a couple days ago, he asked me if I had ever been pregnant. I told him no and when I asked why he wanted to know, he said no reason. Is he just embarrassed to tell me the reason?? Could you give me some insight into why he asked me? Reply to this Question Share |
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male
reader, Serpico +, writes (8 January 2013):
I agree w Karlos. It was an RJ question, and the first of many. If you have a colored sexual past, I doubt your relationship will work long term. Not making an ethical judgement, but a metaphysical one, ie, not what's right or wrong, just what is.
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (8 January 2013):
I've asked my boyfriend really odd random questions because I see something happen in a movie or on TV or read it in a magazine and I genuinely am just curious. And if I had a nickel for every time I read about something on this site and ask about it, I would be rich.
Could also go the other way too, that at some point someone in his life was pregnant and he wants to make sure there isn't any kind of "drama" about it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2013): Well thanks for totally undermining my opinion on this matter "Anon_e_mouse"!
If you have the solid answers to the posters problems, maybe we should let you solve all the problems by yourself.
My initial response was that its clearly a strange question to just blurt out of the blue, and without any reason at all for asking it.
I also gave a 2nd opinion because I don't know (unlike you apparently) the REAL reason her boyfriend asked her. Like others said, he may have read an article on pregnancy, or heard rumours, or maybe it was even an indirect remark about the OP's body shape or size...who knows, only her boyfriend.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2013): Pretty strange question if you ask me. Just ask him again where that question came from. Things like that don't come from nowhere, maybe he was reading an article on miscarriages or abortions or something that day, maybe he heard a rumour or something. Try not to assume the worst but you do deserve an explanation as to where that came from.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (8 January 2013):
Boy does that sound like a "baggage" question if I ever heard one!
Whenever I hear unusual questions phrased unusually, I always wonder who got pregnant in his life. Did he get a girl pregnant? Did his sister get pregnant? Is he out looking to have a baby? Did he have a pregnancy scare with a former girl who "pulled the goalie" on him?
I also hear possible jealousy in that question too, but usually the purely jealous guy would ask how many guys a girl has been with in the past.
One thing's for certain -- there's NO WAY a guy would ask that question for "no reason". There's a reason alright, and I'm predicting that it's a baggage reason, meaning he's had some experience with this, either himself, a loved one, or a buddy who talked about being trapped or some stupid thing like that.
Either way, that would put me off big time, and I'd be mulling it over about it being a dealbreaker if that question were asked for "no reason" less than a month into a relationship. It would take a damn good reason for me to let that one slide.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2013): Hmm this may sound mean but maybe he was referring to something about the way your body looks?? I could be terribly wrong but it sounds like he was indirectly saying something. If you are not chubby then disregard this! If you are he is not worth it and it seems like he isn't very honest. Once again no intention to make you feel bad :)
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A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (8 January 2013):
So after one month he pops the "have you ever been pregnant?"
And then when you asked him why he wanted to know he didn't tell you? RED FLAG!
That's a bit of a strange question to ask EVER never mind after just a month.
"On the other hand, maybe it was just a general question of interest or curiosity. Like you asking him if he's ever made a girl pregnant before. Perhaps there's nothing to it."
Rubbish! Somethings up here.
Ask him until he gives you a proper answer. "Somethings been bothering me... I still can't figure out why you asked me if I had ever been pregnant?"
If a girl ever asked me this EVER I'd think something's not right here. If she asked me after 1 month of dating I'd walk away. You're still strangers really.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2013): Maybe he's just the jealous type who wouldn't be able to get his head round a situation where a guy other than himself has had his (now) girlfriend pregnant.
Some guys are like that, some girls too. Some people just can't bare the thought of their partners having had a past before being with them.
On the other hand, maybe it was just a general question of interest or curiosity. Like you asking him if he's ever made a girl pregnant before. Perhaps there's nothing to it.
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