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... Send *ensitiveBloke a private message | | | *ensitiveBloke's profile:I am a Christian and my life experiences and advice are shaped by my faith.
I always try to offer advice that lines up with the Bible's teachings on relationships.
I'm a passionate believer in marriage, and will always encourage husbands and wives to do everything they possibly can to make their marriages work.
I'm not here to force my views on anyone, but I hope I can give genuinely helpful advice whenever possible. |
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I overhear people saying 'why is she with him' because I'm just an average guy whereas she is beautiful inside and out, should I ask my girlfriend what she saw in me?
Q. I have been dating this beautiful girl for abt a year now!she's nice,kinda,a well educated woman she's working at a hospital..she's beautiful not only on the outside but also the inside and that's what attracted me to her! But the only thing that ...
A. 8 March 2013: There are lots of things that make someone attractive to someone else. It's not just about looks!
Whatever does it for your girlfriend, you've obviously got it!... (read in full...)
Should I Tell my boyfriend what goes on in my head?
Q. I have low self esteem. Its really bad to where I'd call out of work and miss school so i can stay home and hide under my blankets and cry. I am my worst enemy and for years Ive been trying to get better. But i cant help it when i have my moments. ...
A. 8 March 2013: Be completely open with your boyfriend about everything, and then get an appointment with your doctor who'll help start you down the road to getting better.... (read in full...)
My husband wants sex and I don’t. I love my husband. I just don’t want to have sex with him.
Q. My problem is a little embarrassing, but it’s causing a lot of trouble in my marriage. My husband wants sex and I don’t. I love my husband. I just don’t want to have sex with him. It has gotten to the point I dread the weekend because I know...
A. 7 March 2013: Sex is NOT all that he wants from you, but he does need it from you. If you don't have sex with him, he will eventually leave you for sure.
Can you agree with him that you'll have sex with him, say, once a week? I guess not, because i'm guessing... (read in full...)
I want to leave him and find someone I can show affection to, but I worry it will affect my children negatively.
Q. My husband and I have been together for 17years and married for almost 12. We are fairly young to have a relationship that has gone on for this long...I am 32 and he is 34. It was great in the beginning, however over the years we hardly touch, talk ...
A. 7 March 2013: You need to pour your heart out to your husband and tell him everything. He needs to understand exactly where you're at so he realises he needs to wake up and do something.... (read in full...)
Boyfriend brought up a boy's night out and I wasn't thrilled. We never talked it all out, do I bring it up again?
Q. my boyfriend and i are in our almost late twenties and have been dating for about 6 months..everything is going great and it's the best relationship i have been in. We both truly love each other and he treats me very well and vice versa.I can ...
A. 6 March 2013: It's important to keep friendships going when you're in a couple, and finding the right balance isn't always easy.
It would be good for you to let your boyfriend have an evening out with his mates every now and then, and you should do the same... (read in full...)
Old fashioned parents will not be thrilled to meet my boyfriend. How do I tell him?
Q. How do i explain to my parents that my boyfriend is half black? I'm from a very strict Russian family,and my parents are very old fashioned. We are not racist at all, it just my parents arent very good with changes. Church every sunday, and nothing ...
A. 6 March 2013: There's no particular way to explain it. At the end of the day, tell them the reasons you like him and why you think he would be a suitable boyfriend.
My future mother-in-law was very upset when she realised i was a different nationality from her... (read in full...)
My wife cheated and I want to keep our family together but how do I get over the images in my head?
Q. Hello. I write to you today because I recently found out that my lovely wife, best friend, and mother of my 3 lovely children has had an ongoing sexual relationship for the last 10 years. I found emails from the two of them on her laptop and they ...
A. 4 March 2013: If you really want to make your marriage work, which is what you're obviously wanting to do, i think you are going to both need to see a marriage counsellor. This issue is too big for you to carry alone.
Marriages can survive affairs, and so can y... (read in full...)
I feel suffocated in this relationship! I don't know what to do
Q. I have been dating my bf for 6 months now, when i first met him he had lost his gf of 7 years due to terminal illness, he was a total mess and pretty depressed obviously. I made it my mission to somehow bring him back to "life" and went through a ...
A. 1 March 2013: You can still support him, but only as a friend.
It was not good getting involved with someone who was still grieving for his loved one and clearly not ready to get involved in another relationship. I'm sure you now realise this.
I think couns... (read in full...)
The man I'm supposed to marry in 2 months has been cheating on me!
Q. I need help. I love my fiance and he loves me. We have been together for seven years. I recently found out he has been flirting on his job sites and got a girls number and was texting her. And he hit on a friend of ours. He keeps telling me how ...
A. 27 February 2013: If you can't trust him, you definitely shouldn't marry him.
Call the wedding off now before it's too late.... (read in full...)
Was he tired, confused, emotional for some reason. or just forgetful when he use the name of his ex, (instead of my name), when he spoke to me?
Q. The other day my boyfriend called me by his ex's name. He was making me laugh because I had been previously upset with a family member. All of a sudden while he was telling me a joke he used her name instead of mine. He was with her for three ye...
A. 26 February 2013: This is probably a bloke's worst nightmare, and your boyfriend obviously feels awful about it.
Don't read too much into it, really. When you're with someone for a long time, it just becomes a habit, that's all. It doesn't mean he still has feel... (read in full...)
My life is a mess and I can't talk to girls!
Q. Ever since I'v hit puberty(15) I can't socialize, I've become very nervous and have no self-esteem. I can't even walk past strangers with some feelings of discomfort. And I can't take my eyes off hot women, but yet if they tryed to talk to me my mi...
A. 26 February 2013: It's time to set yourself some personal goals. What job do you want to be doing in 5 or 10 years' time? What courses can you do to start you on the path to that?
Exercise is good, but exercise outside the house is much better. Take up a hobby or... (read in full...)
Should I call him and tell him how I really feel?
Q. okay so..here it is under an unusual planetary alignment i meet the most amazing man it was strange i felt a deep connection with him when we shook hands i will never forget gazing into his eyes when i met him. i could not describe the pow...
A. 26 February 2013: Contact him. You've got nothing to lose. Ask him if he fancies going for a drink sometime, and see how it goes from there.... (read in full...)
She keeps finding fault with me. Though not afraid to ask for presents.Help please, because I am confused about what to do?
Q. My gf and I have been dating for 2.5 years. We spoke today over the phone, and she asked me if I want to know what she feels right now. I said yes. She said that a few days ago, I had put her down. I asked how. She explained that she felt hurt wh...
A. 25 February 2013: She sounds like a high emotional maintenance kinda girl.
Personally I would run a mile.
The question is: do you want to be with someone who's never happy? There are plenty of content, happy people out there.... (read in full...)
I'm supposed to be getting married in May. My fiance has been again been caught talking sexual on dating sites!
Q. I am supposed to be getting married in June. The honeymoon is even booked. After the wedding she would have been moving into my house. We have been together for over 5 years. It has been an off and on relationship for the last 3 years. Mainly d...
A. 21 February 2013: So she's done it yet again, and this time she's not even sorry.
You know what you need to do.... (read in full...)
I'm really trying to save myself for marriage and dating a non-virgin really bothers me
Q. I recently got into a relationship with a guy I really like. We have terrible communication and it makes me angry. He always apologizes for that lack of good communication in our relationship. The thing is, we actually started talking alright the ...
A. 19 February 2013: It's always good to talk to your boyfriend about your feelings. Otherwise, what's the point of being in a relationship if you can't do that?
It's important you make it clear to your boyfriends where you stand as you really want to be with someone ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says the past is the past but I have trust issues!
Q. I have been with my fiance for seven years. We broke up for five monthe in 2011. When we were broken up he was awful. He lied to me so many times. He started seeing a much younger girl. We are back together now. And we are planning our wedding in ...
A. 19 February 2013: If you can't trust him, do not marry him.
Trust will take time to rebuild, if it ever does. Take your time over this, but DO NOT MARRY HIM.... (read in full...)
There's a thief in my house and my parents won't help me pin them down
Q. Okay, so i have a paper round every weekend i get paid £18, and i have been saving my money for ages, basically on Friday i had 5 £20 notes for sure positive certain and a £5 note i counted it all and i definitely did not spend it. So i had £100 ...
A. 18 February 2013: You could invest in a safe. You could keep your money and any other personal things in there too.... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is ditching me for work and I'm having a hard time dealing with it
Q. To start, I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. From the beginning he's been the type who's needed his space, and isn't much for daily communication. I could accept that, in the beginning. Recently he's come in to more work, and I've...
A. 18 February 2013: It does sound like he's not that into you, or else he would enjoy spending time with you.... (read in full...)
Have I spoiled my last child to the point where he doesn't want to grow up?
Q. Dear Cupid ,I have raised my children from babies to adults my daughter has graduated and has a job and moved on with her life. Now my son is the last one with me at home he will be 18 in nine months I told him his gravy train will end on his eigh...
A. 18 February 2013: You're teaching him to be a responsible young man. Well done you.... (read in full...)
He is too intense - could this be a bad sign?
Q. I have been divorced 6yrs and i'm 48yrs old. Last week I met a guy as I was window shopping in the town. He stopped me and told me I am the woman of his dreams and can we talk.(Of course I was flattered, and would like to be in a relationship after ...
A. 18 February 2013: He sounds a bit creepy. How could he say you were the woman of his dreams when he'd never spoken to you before?
If you don't want to meet up with him for coffee, tell him you aren't interested and ask him to stop contacting you. If he keeps co... (read in full...)
Best friends nightmare son affecting our friendship! Help!
Q. My best friend whom I love to bits has a four year old son that is a NIGHTMARE... I am pretty sure he is ADHD.. and I have commented about this before and she rejected that so fast! But he is such a nightmare to be around. When they come to my ...
A. 14 February 2013: Difficult one. You need to draw the line at things like jumping up and down on your couch or scratching your table. Your friend needs to realise that these sorts of things are not ok. Other than that, there probably ain't much you can do. Some par... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is so jealous its absolutely crazy!
Q. Hi!!! Please some one help me. I'm engaged to my girlfriend of 3 years. She's soo jealous it's not even funny. We have had our issues in the past mainly because she's goes crazy when I look at girls. Or a movie with a sex scene in it...not a porno...
A. 14 February 2013: She's not right in the head. Do not get married to her until she sorts herself out, which will probably be never I'm afraid.... (read in full...)
Is she just being friendly or interested?
Q. I got to know this girl when i was in my previous company and while i was interested in knowing more about her, i was about to quit and she was taking over my duties so i did not feel it was appropriate and i left it at that. But a few months aft...
A. 13 February 2013: If she was interested in going out with you, she would suggest a time when she could do it.
Most people are not that friendly in the way you've described, but her answer to you is pretty clear: there will never be anything more than friendsh... (read in full...)
Struggling with the maintenance payments to my ex and worried about losing my girlfriend over this!
Q. Hi has anyone been in my situation? Any advice? I have been divorced 6 years and pay maintenance to ex and for 1 child, but in past 3 years changes at work meant no raise and no bonuses for that time-I've looked for another job but nothing yet. I ...
A. 6 February 2013: Something is wrong here. Your maintenance payments should only be increasing if your earnings increase. You can use an online calculator to work out how much you should be paying or see the citizen's advice bureau for free if you need further ... (read in full...)
He re-arranged my furniture because his kids wanted it that way! They were guests, surely they should have left it alone?
Q. Please help. I have stayed over at boyfriends place before, when his two kids of 9 and 7 were visiting as well. (They live with their mum.) There were no real problems. He had some time off to look after them when they had a couple of days off ...
A. 5 February 2013: Yes, your boyfriend probably should have asked you first, but is moving furniture around in a spare room such a big deal? Maybe if they're going to come round regularly you might consider leaving it they way they like it? It would make you a good ... (read in full...)
My overweight family keep calling me fat!
Q. My family keep caling me fat, My younger sister is at least a stone or two heavier than me (atleast 14lb heavier than me for those who aren't from the uk). My mum is overweight, my dad is overweight and yet all they ever do is call me names like fat ...
A. 5 February 2013: Well done for deciding to lose weight! The best way to do it is to permanently change your eating habits for good rather than by crash dieting. Think of it as a long term goal. There are plenty of healthy eating plans out there, and yo... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wont get engaged to me unless I get her a 20 000 euro engagement ring
Q. Hi, I ve posted on this website before and I ve found the answere really helpful so I am hoping for some more advice please. I ve been agonizing over this for some time, would be really interested to hear what others think.. My girlfriend w...
A. 5 February 2013: It's not working, this relationship, is it?
The engagement ring is just one in a long list of problems. And it won't just stop there. It'll be one thing after another.
You could do so much better. Make the decision to end this once and for all... (read in full...)
I want my boyfriend to be more of a man. How do I do this?
Q. Well, me and my bf had been together for 4 years and he's so good to me. We are 23.Problem is, sometimes I feel down when seeing him talking and acting like a girl. When he's talking, he often uses the voice like how a girl laugh. Oh I don't know ...
A. 4 February 2013: It's not possible to change someone's personality, so stop trying.
Accept him and love him warts and all, or leave him.... (read in full...)
I have a busy active life. Yet what on earth do I do to try and meet more people?
Q. This is a bit long and multi-faceted, I will try to summarise. Been single three years, 39, own place, interesting but not highly paid job but I'm only full-time person so no real work colleagues I see daily. Involved in amateur drama, lot...
A. 4 February 2013: If you tried internet dating but only met two women in 18 months, you must be doing something wrong!
Haven't you posted here before?... (read in full...)
Should I marry my long term bf despite lack of physical attraction & chemistry? please help.
Q. hello, i am in emotional dilemma right now. to be honest that is an understatement. i am in hell because everything that is going on with my life is in turmoil. i don't know if i should marry my bf for 10 years. i don't know what to do? i only ...
A. 4 February 2013: If there's no physical attraction then he's not a diamond!!!... (read in full...)
What does it mean if a guy calls you "high maintenance"?
Q. What exactly does it mean by 'high maintenace'.. The guy I'm dating now its been a few weeks and the reason he dint ask me out earlier is because he thought I would be 'high maintenance'..what did that mean:( ?...
A. 1 February 2013: The other answers have hit the nail on the head. Consider the following questions: Do you expect to be spoilt regularly by your boyfriend? Do you expect him to spend freely and generously on you as that shows that he loves you? Do you expect ... (read in full...)
Should I marry my long term bf despite lack of physical attraction & chemistry? please help.
Q. hello, i am in emotional dilemma right now. to be honest that is an understatement. i am in hell because everything that is going on with my life is in turmoil. i don't know if i should marry my bf for 10 years. i don't know what to do? i only ...
A. 28 January 2013: He's not perfect: you're not physically attracted to him!
Deep down I think you know marrying him is wrong, but you just can't bring yourself to end it. Letting go of him is the most loving thing to do, and the best thing for his happines... (read in full...)
Should I marry my long term bf despite lack of physical attraction & chemistry? please help.
Q. hello, i am in emotional dilemma right now. to be honest that is an understatement. i am in hell because everything that is going on with my life is in turmoil. i don't know if i should marry my bf for 10 years. i don't know what to do? i only ...
A. 25 January 2013: No, you should not marry him. Physical atraction is very important and respecting someone for being a good person is simply not enough for marrying someone.... (read in full...)
We are married but separated and husband has signed up for dating site. What steps do I take now?
Q. Hello I've had problems since I married and moved in together (been married 2 years. We have taken a 'break' where he has moved out. I find im a happier on my own, no stress of arguing about how much he drinks each evening, him not going to bed...
A. 23 January 2013: Your next step is marriage counselling.... (read in full...)
Is my fiancé acting up? Has she been too spoilt in the past? Not sure what to do.
Q. So here's my story. My fiancé and I are supposed to be getting married in July but we have been having problems. We have been engaged since March 2012. To give some quick background we have dated for 4 years and lived together for 3. We live...
A. 23 January 2013: She sounds demanding and selfish. I don't know why you put up with her. She's just not worth it. People like that are never satisfied. The demands will be constant and ever-changing. You should think long and hard about this. Do you really want ... (read in full...)
Does she like me? How do I make sure I don't give her the wrong impression that I like her when I only want to be friends?
Q. I am currently studying in school and I have no experience in in dealing with the most minor matters in love, especially when rejecting someone. A few months ago, a girl in my similar school started a conversation with me on Facebook. We hav...
A. 21 January 2013: Tell your classmate that you hope she's not getting the wrong idea and that you only want to be friends. She'll probably pass the message on.... (read in full...)
I'm having a very hard time dealing with this break up even though, logically, we are not suited....
Q. My long distance boyfriend and I broke up in November 2012. We had been together for 4 years. We broke up 2 years into our relationship but got back together 3 months later. To begin with the feelings were mutual and we both agreed a break u...
A. 21 January 2013: He's moved on and you need to too. Take the positives from what you've learned. There is someone better suited to you out there.
You need to be confident in who you are as a person before launching into another relationship else you'll bring al... (read in full...)
Broke up with my GF because I still have feelings for my ex, but she has a BF. How can I move on?
Q. I had been with my ex girlfriend, R, for about 2 and a half years. I always thought that I was actually happy, but near the end of our relationship I realized that I was mostly in denial. When I found out that the girl that I had been with before ...
A. 21 January 2013: She's made her decision. You need to let her go. Don't start any new relationships until you've done this. It wouldn't be fair on any new girlfriend.... (read in full...)
Should I break up with my LDR partner whilst visiting him, or on the phone?
Q. I've been thinking about breaking up with my bf for a while now. We've been together for over 2 years, and while there isn't anything specifically wrong, and we get on great, but I just don't feel right about it, and I know I dont want to be with ...
A. 18 January 2013: This is very tricky. I think something like this can only be done face to face. You can't really leave it to the end of your visit as what if he wants to get affectionate with you? Do you do it pretending everything's alright? No, that wouldn't be ... (read in full...)
Can anyone pls explain how someone can be in love and then just lose feelings overnight?
Q. Can anyone pls explain how someone can be in love and then just lose feelings overnight? I joined on line dating. Not to date, not to cheat, but because I was bored because he would rather be out football training, than be home with me. He doesnt ...
A. 18 January 2013: You don't just lose feelings overnight. It's probably been gradually happening for a while.
You should NOT have gone on a dating site though while you were in a relationship with someone else. If you wanted to start a new relationship, you shou... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's children are not invited to my family's events. How can I handle this?
Q. I have a small predicament that I could do with some help with. Myself and my fella have been together over 18 months. He has 2 kids and we all love each other to bits. My parents took a long time to accept it but they have now. The only prob...
A. 17 January 2013: You need to press the question: why are his kids not welcome? It's time to show some solidarity with your man and say if his kids aren't welcome and other people's kids are then we're not coming.... (read in full...)
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