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*ldbag

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*ldbag's profile:

Londoner city girl through & through

dating here n there

learnt my lessons at the University of Life

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Want a low cost way to get a flat stomach by Dec 2013. Is my goal achievable and how?

Q.   I am 1.63m/5'4" and I weigh 66kg/146lbs and 20 percent body fat. I want to get a flat stomach and get my body fat down to 10-12 percent by mid December. I don't know how to do this when I have a limited budget for food and can't eat 5 times a day ...

A.   13 June 2013: Hi Yea the jean 'fittings' are a good guide. Well done you. But try to keep the exercise regular, make it same as doing your teeth morning and/or eve. Just get in the habit.... (read in full...)

Boyfriend quit his job, I'm the only one working. He's angry because I bought something for myself!

Q.   My boyfriend quit his job because he hated it so much. We are in week 7 of him not having a job and I don't feel that he is really making much of an effort to look for one. I am paying his mortgage (my name is not on the house) and the food for the ...

A.   1 June 2013: Hi After reading the additional posts it's obvious you and he are just not compatable. You say he has attributes you love,ok, but you want different things in life,your driven and motivated, would rather have a room for your shoes than incom... (read in full...)

Boyfriend quit his job, I'm the only one working. He's angry because I bought something for myself!

Q.   My boyfriend quit his job because he hated it so much. We are in week 7 of him not having a job and I don't feel that he is really making much of an effort to look for one. I am paying his mortgage (my name is not on the house) and the food for the ...

A.   31 May 2013: Hi Nobody is holding a gun to your head, making you stay and pay are they? You can move out, find a place of your own, your working and have a good income. Some people do feel a job is just not important enough to ruin health and well-bei... (read in full...)

I'm 8 months pregnant b/f cheated, he lied until the girl sent the video of them having sex!

Q.   I am 8 months pregnant and just found out my boy friend cheated, he said it was a mistake and he's so sorry but I don't know what to do, I want to be with him but I dont at the same time! The worst part is she filmed it and sent it to me, he ...

A.   31 May 2013: Hi I am so sorry, what a total scumbag he is and so is the woman. Your predicament is made worse because your vulnerable being pregnant and due so soon. Its a scary thought going it alone. Personally I think you should dump his sorry ass, you d... (read in full...)

My husband's comment about "you women" made me immediately think he's cheating!

Q.   I have suspected for months that things have been going on at my husband's place of work although of course he has strongly denied as he really has too much to lose. However, we were about to go to bed for sex the other evening and it was cold so ...

A.   31 May 2013: Hi It does sound suspicious but I think having his underwear tested is a tad too far. I think if he was going to cheat, as per his history, he would have done it a lot more during 30 years of marriage to you and as these suspicions sound isolated... (read in full...)

If he was backing off from me, why go to such lengths to show that this girl is just his friend?

Q.   I have a quick question about male behavior. I have a friend i work with.. He was real flirty and and a big group of us went out and he was all about me. I didn't really think a whole lot on it since he was going through a divorce and we were all ...

A.   31 May 2013: Hi He might not have been on FB or read your page, unless he commented on there - you don't know he did. Go enjoy your break and forget him for your own sake, you appear to need his attention and enjoy it too much. He is seeing or not a... (read in full...)

Is it reasonable for your fiance to demand that you never speak to any exes?

Q.   My fiance and I recently got engaged, mostly due to the fact that I got pregnant. We were having some problems but when we found out, we decided to work on it. It hasn't been easy but things are slowly improving and we're both excited about the ...

A.   29 May 2013: Hi Your assuming your fiancé will tell you not to email a reply to your ex, even though it's not happened yet and would be purely innocent. Your ex has merely congratulated you, so all you need to do is say thanks. Why not just do that,... (read in full...)

My former teacher always knew how I felt about him. He knew I always loved him, so why he reacted like this when I admitted it?

Q.   Dear readers, I simply need help and advice. I have been some stupid school girl and fell for a married teacher. I don't even know how to put into words and I don't know whose fault. But what happened has happened. This teacher didn'...

A.   29 May 2013: Hi You cannot take all the blame here, he was the adult and in a professional capacity he was behaving in a way that was wrong. You were a child and he was only supposed to teach you. He actively encouraged you and you enjoyed the attention an... (read in full...)

How do I get out of this awkward dating thing with this guy I met through a dating website? I'm just not good at saying no or bringing up these things. Help?

Q.   Hey All! So I met this guy through a dating website but Frankly meeting someone through a dating website is not a ideal thing for me and I just did it because my friend forced me to join it. I have quit it now because I don't think it works f...

A.   29 May 2013: Hi Just tell him and get it over with, its the ideal time while there is this distance between you. Its not fair to flirt and string him along, your keeping his hopes up when you know you don't want him. Imagine if a guy did it to you. Te... (read in full...)

Do I stay longer to see or do I leave now with my heart still intact relatively??

Q.   I have been seeing this guy for a year and a half now and we recently had the talk of where it going. He said he not an emotional guy and doesn't form attachments easily. Has had relationships in the past of few years long and was still not ...

A.   29 May 2013: Hi Why would you want to stay with a guy who is emotionally unavailable and craves excitement? Walk away, head high, leave him to it. 18 months is long enough to give this one - now go enjoy yourself for a bit.... (read in full...)

Is my recent ex dating already?

Q.   Dated ex gf for year and half. She broke up with me 5 months ago. A few weeks ago she contacts me and says still in love with me, misses me, and wanted to spend all kinds of time together. It was great because I still loved her. She then says ...

A.   29 May 2013: Hi IF you really need to know, then ask her. She, at the moment is playing you, using the fact you went back to her so easily even after 5 months. My guess is she met somebody, it didn't work out, she got in touch with you and now either *he* ... (read in full...)

I feel confused as to what he is thinking!

Q.   I need help my new relationship confuses the hell out of me! I have been seeing someone for four months and I don't get my relationship!. I've been divorced twice have three kids. I started seeing my little boys friends Dad in January he split wi...

A.   28 May 2013: Hi I think he's confused too, he is newly single, working all hours and has the children to see. I feel he needs a friend more than a wife or girlfriend. A FWB arrangement. If you want more then he isn't for you just now.He cares but hi... (read in full...)

Is it even worth it to have my mother in my life?

Q.   I'm at breaking point in my relationship with my mother. We've never had the best of relationships anyway but I'm seriously considering cutting her out of my life. My mother has never liked or loved me as a person. I certainly have never felt it or ...

A.   28 May 2013: Hi Mother daughter relationships are difficult when they go wrong. We only get one who we hope nurtures and supports us,loves us unconditionaly. When this doesn't happen it stays with you for life. I do think you should have invited her to y... (read in full...)

Should I write to my ex or not?

Q.   I left a 5 year on-off relationship about 20 months ago. He was seeing other women. I said I will stay friends but I read few articles about 'no contact rules' to heal myself so I followed it and have been fine. I am fine as I had closure. ...

A.   28 May 2013: Hi No, in fact I would bet that by now or at least in the next few days you will know it was a bad idea. If you bumped into him in the street or one of his family you could ask after his mum but forcing the issue is not wise. You've done well... (read in full...)

I'm hurt that he didn't wish me well or say he was sorry for how things turned out

Q.   I was seeing someone on/off for 3 years. He got divorced about 10 months ago. Seemed interested at first, but then we had a disagreement. He then back tracked ever since. Which was 7 months ago. He insisted he didn't want to be in a relationship. ...

A.   28 May 2013: Hi He told you he didn't want to be in a relationship, which is perfectly normal with new divorcees.Now he has somebody new, seeing how it goes. He already friend zoned you months ago but when you deleted him off FB he knew your friendsh... (read in full...)

The men I date always talk about their ex's is this normal?

Q.   Hello, I just want an honest opinion on this one. Im an attractive, pretty cool young woman who is independent. I wonder why men that I date always tell me or talk about other women? When I say other women I mean ex girlfriends or some women in ...

A.   27 May 2013: Hi Funnily enough I bumped into a guy this weekend that I dated and finished with because of his Ex references and countless female mates. Guess what he bought up in the conversation - yes - the Ex. I just said oh your still not back togethe... (read in full...)

I cannot imagine making myself emotionally vulnerable after everything I have seen and heard

Q.   I grew up sheltered from the outside world. I believed that no one was having sex in high school(at least at mine), that most people were monogamous and honest in their relationships and that cheating was a very rare occurrence. however, A few years ...

A.   25 May 2013: Hi Most people who don't trust in relationships have been hurt in the past.However they learn to trust again and understand that not everyones bad or will let them down in some way. We are all human,we all make mistakes, that's life.If you don'... (read in full...)

I confronted my friend about never paying when we go out together. Was this the right way to deal with the situation? Please advise?

Q.   I have a friend who never pays for her drinks when we go out to bars. She is the one that ussualy drives, so I always buy her first drink, but then she kind of assumes that the whole nite is on me. It happened already so many times, that I fi...

A.   25 May 2013: Hi Designated drivers should be different every outing, that way the person who's turn it is stays sober and the rest drink. If you all get a cab,tube or bus home then everyone stands their round or pays for their own drinks, however you pre-... (read in full...)

My friend has been dating and now has no time for me

Q.   My best friend of 10 years has recently started a new relationship and since then she has pretty much cut all contact with me. She tells me that she can't afford to do anything or she has no time to meet me, yet I see her tagged on Facebook 3/4 ...

A.   25 May 2013: Hi You know something I wouldn't bother. She isn't behaving like a friend. Fair enough she has a new relationship but she sounds like she has a new life too. It happens, its sad when it does, let her get on with it and find new things and frien... (read in full...)

Swept off my feet to be dropped on my butt

Q.   Am I insane? I met a guy on match.com. We messaged eachother at the same time. He was stationed in afghanistan and would be home in two months. He was in special forces (i won't say what but it is pretty badass). we exchanged texts and emails d...

A.   25 May 2013: Hi Yes just keep on trucking. As you say, he can get any girl he wants but you didn't go running after him. Or go pick up your stuff. Good for you. Men like him are professional players,know they can reel girls in,so they do.His job gives hi... (read in full...)

If he was backing off from me, why go to such lengths to show that this girl is just his friend?

Q.   I have a quick question about male behavior. I have a friend i work with.. He was real flirty and and a big group of us went out and he was all about me. I didn't really think a whole lot on it since he was going through a divorce and we were all ...

A.   25 May 2013: Hi Because he respects you and didn't want you thinking he had fed you a line? He would be stupid to lie as you work together and everyone sounds like they mingle socially, so you would be able to find the truth because people gossip. Especial... (read in full...)

Does sleeping in separate beds always lead to the end of a relationship?

Q.   does sleeping in separate beds always lead to the end of a relationship? i ask because my fiance and i live together and i find it hard to sleep next to him due to his snoring. i've had important professional exams today, so for the last week, he's ...

A.   24 May 2013: Check this out http://www.ehow.com/way_5287043_natural-ways-stop-snoring.html... (read in full...)

Does sleeping in separate beds always lead to the end of a relationship?

Q.   does sleeping in separate beds always lead to the end of a relationship? i ask because my fiance and i live together and i find it hard to sleep next to him due to his snoring. i've had important professional exams today, so for the last week, he's ...

A.   24 May 2013: Hi My parents slept in separate beds for the later years of their 50+ year marriage, each had their own rooms. It suited them. At your age though I would think it would make him feel rejected in some way. I totally get your problem though. ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is out flirting with women while I'm home studying. All I get from him was a drunk text 3 days ago. What do I do?

Q.   Today at night I received a message from our mutual friend that my bf was flirting and kissing with women at some party. Not a woman but women. I am pretty hurt. We had a good relationship but last three weeks he behaved really weird. He didn't w...

A.   24 May 2013: Hi His timing is really bad, you need to focus on your final exams, not him. I would put him out of your mind,no more contact, hard I know, but you can sort out him/you after your studies have finished. You get one go at these exams,its th... (read in full...)

Why does my ex want nothing to do with me?

Q.   My ex broke up with me 7 months ago and has maintained no contact since then. I have always loved him and a part of me still does, and I accept that he does not want to be with me anymore, but why doesn't he at least want to be friends with me? I...

A.   23 May 2013: Hi It's good you are dating and recovering. It's only when you have children there's a need to communicate with an Ex, to remain civil. He ended the relationship for whatever reasons and now he is recovering and moving forward, maybe even seein... (read in full...)

Why is he really chatty with other girls but not with me?

Q.   Why does he do that? I don't understand him? So there's this cute guy that I've liked for a while now. He has alot of girly friends and is very chatty with them but he tends to be very quiet with me. Whenever he's talking to them and ...

A.   23 May 2013: Hi I agree with anonymous, this man has not asked you out for a date so he is not interested in dating you, simple. As for saying he needs a massage that's a throw away statement, I say it if my back hurts or after I have been cycling any dist... (read in full...)

How could a guy like him fall for a girl like her?

Q.   Thank you for taking the time to read my question. I have been dating the most wonderful man, Jeff, for about a year now, I have met his parents and he’s met mine, we’re planning to get married early next year. Everything’s perfect and I may be j...

A.   23 May 2013: Hi Forget it, it was him as much as her, 2 people, bored, single and at a loose end met up twice. So what. It's history, no big deal. He 'confessed' now draw a line under it. He treats you like a princess, his parents adore you, your gettin... (read in full...)

He wants to get married and have children and I'm not sure yet. Do I stay and have kids or do I let him go?

Q.   I have been together with a guy for two years. We live together and for the most part, things are fine. We come from different cultures and are quite different as people, but we get on well in many respects. I'm happy enough with him but he doesn't ...

A.   22 May 2013: Hi Your 27, that's not 20. You haven't started your career, taking Law will mean years of study ahead too, so when DO you want children, if at all? Also, more importantly, you don't sound head over heels in love with this guy, you just sound c... (read in full...)

So girls, would you rather have a chat and a long cuddle etc from a guy you are attracted to, or better that he not approach you at all, if he can't give you more time?

Q.   Question for girls, I have quite long periods when I don't have time to date girls, due to time restraints of work and being on call there. My job requires me at times to be in the busy nightlife area. I often get signals from girls trying to get me ...

A.   22 May 2013: Hi Well I reckon you must look like David Beckham with a body to match - or you use that certain body spray Good luck with the search - you only need one good woman... (read in full...)

No sex since January. Am I being paranoid? My instincts say he's messing about, but hides things. How can I be sure of it??

Q.   Am I paranoid or is he up to something? I recently have noticed my boyfriend is acting like he's up to something lately. We haven't been intimate since January. I put this down to him having a low sex drive and he had made comments about not gett...

A.   22 May 2013: Hi Sounds like he has another woman/women providing sex. Few men go without, especially for months. Add all the other behaviour and it shouts that something's not right here. You need to have a good talk, somewhere other than home because of ... (read in full...)

What can I do, to stay strong, and stop myself texting him hurtful things?

Q.   my boyfriend keeps leaving the house when we start arguing and saying its over. I struggled a lot just before we met with money being on my own working mininum wage and having two kids. He has helped me out but now throws it in my face. I've gone...

A.   22 May 2013: Hi I was a single mum after a divorce, worked hard and went without. That's how it is. It's still better to go without and have peace of mind in your home. The kids will grow up knowing you did everything for them, and one day be independent a... (read in full...)

Online dating: yay or nay?

Q.   I signed up for an online dating site and received a few messages already. Then I realized I was too shy to even reply back to a simple message! Ugh! I thought I would give it a try but I'm still a little on the fence on whether it's a good ide...

A.   22 May 2013: Hi I don't like online dating, but know people who love the fact there's always some guy to go for a drink with during the boring week nights, if you plan it that way.And you never know. There are a lot of married men, men just out of long term... (read in full...)

He wants a break after 3 months, he's not sure when he'll be ready to start dating me again. What should I do?

Q.   I met a guy online around 3 months ago. I wasn't initially into him but I liked him so I decided to give it a go. He runs his own startup business therefore we had an understanding from the off that we'd only see each other infrequently. He'd had ...

A.   22 May 2013: Hi He's running scared with age old excuses. You did everything right, but he's the wrong man to give your all to. Cut contact and move on without him.He just wants a FWB situation, you want a full-on relationship.... (read in full...)

So girls, would you rather have a chat and a long cuddle etc from a guy you are attracted to, or better that he not approach you at all, if he can't give you more time?

Q.   Question for girls, I have quite long periods when I don't have time to date girls, due to time restraints of work and being on call there. My job requires me at times to be in the busy nightlife area. I often get signals from girls trying to get me ...

A.   22 May 2013: Hi I like the way you seem to think older women would be more inclined to go for a cuddle than nothing.Younger men are ok to look at and admire but that's it.Each to their own though. My daughter would freak out if some guy your age,loaded ... (read in full...)

have people broken mirrors and actually had bad luck after?

Q.   you might think i'm stupid for even asking this question. But this morning I dropped my mirror and a chunk of the corner cracked and came off. I am quite superstitious, so I was wondering if it is true that if you break a mirror it's bad luck? ...

A.   20 May 2013: Hi My bad luck was hanging a mirror in new flat and it fell off wall and broke. I do salute magpies if there's only one, but that's just habit - its s'posed to cancel the bad luck they bring. You make your own luck but everyone has bad day... (read in full...)

My boyfriend has been acting strangely since he discovered I deleted his ex-girlfriend's number from his phone

Q.   My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship now because he is from the UK and I am from North America and I have to finish university until December, then we can be together. We have been dating for about a year and a half now and have...

A.   20 May 2013: Hi You shouldn't have deleted her number no, its his phone his contact However the fact he noticed,had looked for her number plus he doesn't want you over visiting the end of summer and the poem.. suggests all is not well with you and him Y... (read in full...)

My boyfriend's lack of ambition is taking a toll on me

Q.   My boyfriend says he's lost his lust for life. And I can see a serious lack of motivation and drive but because Ive only been in the picture for two years I dont know for sure if this is a recent thing or if he has always been this way. He is a ...

A.   20 May 2013: Hi If you want a guy who has his shit together then he is not for you, your not his mum or his counsellor He sounds pretty depressed, the realisation his dreams won't come true could be the root,he is the only one who can get help. If he h... (read in full...)

So girls, would you rather have a chat and a long cuddle etc from a guy you are attracted to, or better that he not approach you at all, if he can't give you more time?

Q.   Question for girls, I have quite long periods when I don't have time to date girls, due to time restraints of work and being on call there. My job requires me at times to be in the busy nightlife area. I often get signals from girls trying to get me ...

A.   19 May 2013: Hi If it's a stranger then leave well alone. Giving a girl a cuddle is a green light, a signal to them you are interested..to walk away afterwards is a slap in the face. I can see your predicament but this is not the answer, not sure what is... (read in full...)

What birth defects could have been caused from caffeine, smoking and being fed by bottle?

Q.   My mother smoked cigarettes and consumed a lot of Caffeine while she was pregnant with me. I was also always bottle fed, never breast fed. I'm wondering what birth defects (if any) could have been caused by those three factors? ...

A.   19 May 2013: Hi Do you have any birth defects ? I am sure by 18-21 they would be known to you. Curious why you felt the need to ask. You can't generalise and websites can only give advice on risks, every baby is different. Your GP with your medical not... (read in full...)

Want a low cost way to get a flat stomach by Dec 2013. Is my goal achievable and how?

Q.   I am 1.63m/5'4" and I weigh 66kg/146lbs and 20 percent body fat. I want to get a flat stomach and get my body fat down to 10-12 percent by mid December. I don't know how to do this when I have a limited budget for food and can't eat 5 times a day ...

A.   18 May 2013: hi Sit-ups! Swimming, skipping, running, start slowly and build up. As for diet lots of veg and fruit. Try looking up high carb diets/recipes on the internet. Never eat a big meal late at night. Have a breakfast that fills you ie porridge oats... (read in full...)

After 8 years of marriage I became totally dependant on my ex-husband to support me

Q.   i am 28 and i don't want to work. I'm still living with my ex husband and his girl friend, he has moved on and i relied on him so much for 8 years. i have become comfortable living like that. i don't work or pay any bills. i don't do anything...

A.   18 May 2013: Hi Well the first thing you need to do is move out. Can you go to family? Then you need a job, everyone has to be responsible for themselves, to earn money pay their way. You need to talk to somebody professional, you need to get to the b... (read in full...)

I got fed up of not seeing my BF enough, so I started going out, and now he's going nuts!!

Q.   Dear all, I have been dating this guy for around 2 years and never really saw him enough,( I have spoken to him on numerous occasions about this and still he wants it his way ,and no change) so recently have started going out more with freind...

A.   18 May 2013: Hi I think your doing the right thing and his reaction just shows he thought he had you right where he wanted you. You have shown you have had enough of sitting around by your actions and if he doesn't like it, then tough.He had his chance t... (read in full...)

Swept off my feet to be dropped on my butt

Q.   Am I insane? I met a guy on match.com. We messaged eachother at the same time. He was stationed in afghanistan and would be home in two months. He was in special forces (i won't say what but it is pretty badass). we exchanged texts and emails d...

A.   20 March 2013: Hi Go back on Match with a false profile, see what he is up to on there,I think you *need* to see if he is on there,if he uses same lines on the new 'you'. You didn't do anything wrong and this man has upset you by his actions.... (read in full...)

Swept off my feet to be dropped on my butt

Q.   Am I insane? I met a guy on match.com. We messaged eachother at the same time. He was stationed in afghanistan and would be home in two months. He was in special forces (i won't say what but it is pretty badass). we exchanged texts and emails d...

A.   19 March 2013: Hi Its like buying a used car,the salesman will make you think it's the best thing since sliced bread and perfect for you but once you take delivery you find a million faults and the salesman is suddenly ice cold He played you,you are not ... (read in full...)

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