A
female
age
30-35,
*ummyBear18127
writes:So, my problem is that I'm ugly. No, I'm not one of those plain but actually pretty girls that complain about their looks. I was born with a disorder, and while I won't go into a bunch of complicated details, I look really different, and ugly.When I'm out in public, I always get made fun of and laughed at. I get asked, "What happened to your face?" more often than I can count. I've never had a boyfriend or even a kiss. No boy has ever had a crush on me. I know God has made me this way, and I try to keep a positive attitude. I am very blessed in the life that I live and I am thankful for my health. It's just so hard when people are constantly making fun of me.I hope to get some plastic surgery when I am older to make me look more normal but that would be a long time away. What I want more than anything is just to be happy in my own skin. I'm not exactly sure what I'm asking for, but maybe some reassuring words? I don't know what to do :(
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female
reader, GummyBear18127 +, writes (6 November 2011):
GummyBear18127 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you all sooooo much!!! I can truly see that there are kind people in this world 3
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2011): I hate it when people say this but it's true, what's inside does counts. Your personality and good qualities will outshine any flaws you have.But no matter what people say you have to accept yourself for who you are because as soon as you get that plastic surgery even though you'll look different your negative feelings will eventually start crawling back. So just try to focus more on your inside because confidence in yourself makes anyone look awesome
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2011): do people laugh at you? They must be A..holes then. Ignore such stupids. I am 32 years old, average looking and have never had a boy friend or kissed one. I have no hope that i will ever have one. what to do? that's life. everything is out of our control.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2011): I think that one day you'll find that special one that you're looking for. The one to look out for is the one who sees the real you, regardless of your image. I'm a guy, I know these things. XD There ARE gentlemen in the world who will see a woman for what she really is. They exist. They really do. Looks fade and one day, those who boast excessively about their looks will often lose their looks and have nothing but their horrid personalities. Be thankful that you aren't one of those people who only see life in a superficial manner. You are blessed to see the world in a different light. The sad truth about how our world works is that people often make judgments about other people in the first or second minute of seeing them. They know nothing of the other person and often conclude they have a person pegged based on their appearance. All I can say to you is do not be disheartened. I'm going to say that you're an extremely strong person for understanding your feelings as well as getting the opinions of others about it. What you're going through and what you're doing by revealing your issue is something extremely difficult, and I respect that. Here's my advice to you. Ignore them and by bettering yourself. If you're a student, then I say to keep studying and study hard. Study for a college degree because that is something that no one can take away from you. It is a sign that you are educated and can handle your own in this world. (Well, supposedly XD) Take classes to better yourself, such as art, music, or dance. In doing these things, not only will you learn skills that you never had, but you'll also gain self-confidence. Empower yourself in some way. The world is yours and the path you choose is yours. Just remember kindness to your fellow humans. ;)At the end of the day, YOU are what you make yourself. No one else will make you successful. Pick yourself up from your sadness and better yourself. Those people who judge you will more often than not, no longer be a part of your life. They are temporary. What will always be with you is your dignity and knowledge that you build up from your own strength. Anyway, good luck and stay strong! Show the world your strength! I hope things work out well for you. :)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2011): I do not agree that everyone who bullies others feels down about themselves.As much as we hate to admit it, some people are just straight up mean. They take pleasure in hurting people just because it hurts people. They might not have some deep inner self hatred or something going on, sometimes people are just jerks. People typically are also prone to being cruel to those who are different or unique as humans typically fear and shun these things. This is where ableism, homophobia, etc comes from. It is very sad, but just be glad that whenever someone comes up and is a jerk to you that you now know not to waste any time on them. STrength and beauty goes way beyond looks. No one in this world is truly ugly.Also, I dont like the comment "looks fade". That implies that only young people are beautiful, and I dont like that. I think every person of different ages, looks, skintypes, etc are beautiful. Beauty is something so much more profound than many people understand. A lot of people give a knee jerk reaction to looks, but really it runs so much deeper.Just reading this, I think you are beautiful.
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female
reader, sweetiebabes  +, writes (5 November 2011):
 Nobody is ugly and don't allow anyone to put you down. Ignore those people who laughed at you because you are better than them in the inside world.Try to think of what you want in your life, something that you can be proud of doing, something that you love and enjoy doing and keep on going, don't settle till you find the right one for you.Try to model those people who become excellent despite their physical disabilities or unattractive people. Look at the story of nick juvicic, he is born with no arms and no legs and yet he did not give up life, he struggled and moved on and is now famous the way he is. Those celebrities for example, not all are beautiful but look at them, they are so much confident to do things they like and want to do. Are you or us different from them? NOOO. What we need to do specifically is not to let ourselves down. Life is all about struggles externally and internally but the most important part is we need to build ourselves internally, our character, our belief that we can do best in our lives, we need to build our character and not to destroy it. Isn't this more beautiful than sabotage your own self-esteem? Get up now and stop thinking of what other people think of you, start thinking of what you want to do in your life and stay focus and keep going. I would suggest, read interesting stories of the people who become very famous despite their disabilities or those unattractive people. This will help you and encourage you of what life is.Move on and be proud of yourself!
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female
reader, KittieS  +, writes (5 November 2011):
 Great advise from Honesty.The more you love yourself and your life the more your shine and people will be more attracted to you!And please forget those horrible people who laughed at you, quite frankly that's what I find ugly!!
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female
reader, ScaredForLove +, writes (5 November 2011):
If i were you I'd be slapping some people in the face... No. But seriously, I'm sorry. Everybody has good qualities, even if they weren't blessed with the looks. Once you find that guy, that decent, amazing guy he will accept you for you! Don't feel bad, be proud!! You are different for a reason! Don't let anybody tell tou different. As ror the surgery thing...only get it if your really positive, but good luck :)
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female
reader, GummyBear18127 +, writes (5 November 2011):
GummyBear18127 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you :) I will try!
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (5 November 2011):
 I really feel for you. People can be so cruel without actually realise the damage that they are doing to that person they are laughing at. At the end of the day nobody in this world is ugly, it is such a horrible word. Everyone is unique and special in there own way. People who make fun off you, only do it because they feel down about themselves and are trying to make themselves feel better by bullying you. Don't listen to them, they are not worth it.
Am sure there are plenty of things that are great about you and looks are not everything. You need to start accepting who you are and look at your good features. You need to raise your self esteem. Put yourself out there, try new hobbies, join new groups or classes. I know it can be scary but honestly there are kind people out there, who are not shallow enough to judge you on your looks.
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