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Would you feel guilt if this happened to someone you had dated?

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 May 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 1 June 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I was with my ex for over 2 years. He dumped me out the blue for Space, which i gave him. But he Dumped me 2 days before i had some results from a MRI Scan i had. (he knew the results was coming, i had the Scan a week befiore the split ) I Didn’t speak to him for 8 months but in these 8 months i had been in hospital and nearly died, have had to give up work, got my results from my MRI Scan (a brain tumour i had 7 years ago had returned) and got diagnosed with a tumour in my leg. I told him all this when we spoke to each other. he didnt really know what to say but kept tellin me to look after myself

If u dumped someone and this happened after would you have any guilt ?

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A male reader, 8 ball United States +, writes (1 June 2009):

8 ball agony auntwell yes i would feel guilty about leaving you but you dont really know why he left you i mean you have to respect his descission for leaving if you love him you cant be selfish to his feelings but on the other hand neither can he but i'm sure he feels guilty but forget it because you have a long battle ahead of you and its god not him that you need to be thinking about because he decides wheather you get better or not not that guy so i mean i no its hard to be alone expeccially in hard times but you have to remember as long as you have god in your heart you are never alone sweety so just keep fighting and good look i feel for you because i just watched this movie called sicko by micheal moore the other day for the first time and loved it it changed my whole outlook on life as far as sickness goes you should watch it but good luck n may god be with you

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009):

I agree with BabyDuck and Annonymous male...I would never want anyone to be with me out of pity or guilt!

As a matter of fact, I left a one year LDR shortly after he had his third heart attack...the split had nothing to do with his health. He said something that to me is unforgivable. I admit I did worry about his health after the break-up, but not to the extent of returning to that relationship. And I know him well enough that he would never want me to be with him out of pity!

I'm sure he cares about you, you're just not the one. I know that hurts. But with time it will heal! I wish you the best and hope you are doing better!

Britt

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2009):

Two separate things here: he wasn't dumping you because you might have been ill so it would be wrong for him to stay with you and give you false hope just because you may be sick. No, he shouldn't feel guilty although I'm sure he feels bad that someone he cared about got ill. Wanting him to feel guilty isn't really healthy either. I'm sorry for what you went through though and like your ex said, hope you are taking care of yourself.

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A female reader, arie United States +, writes (24 May 2009):

arie agony aunti would feel guilty of the fact that something like this would happen to someone so young but he had his reasons to break up and i would feel guilty not being there for you. im really sorry that you have this and i hope god blesses you and gets everything taken care of cuz u dont deserve this. and if the guy dosent care, forget him cuz someone else will

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A female reader, aphexinfinite United Kingdom +, writes (24 May 2009):

aphexinfinite agony auntyes but if you dont love the person then their is no point giving them false hope perhaps he was hoping your tests would be ok and that you would be able to get on with your life. im sorry for what you have had to gone through at such a young age. hes feeling mixed up because even though your not togther he still cares and he doesnt know what to say without giving you false hope of something happening again. try focusin on yourself than him you need to summon all your strength right now. i wish you luck aphex xx

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