A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i don't know how to ask this so i'll just go on with it. first, i'm a bisexual but the world doesn't know that (yet). second, there's this girl. we've been friends for two years now. to make the story short we "went out" last weekend. (whether it was my suggestion or hers is bit vague. she brought it up months ago. sort of forgot and i reminded her.) she paid for the movie and i paid for the dinner.my question is should i tell her that i like her more than a friend likes another? i like her as in i-can't-stop-thinking-about-her and it's-good-i-don't-see-her-everyday-or-i-might-blurt-it-out.i'm afraid that i might destroy our friendship by doing this. should i? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2007): well, I would talk to her about what would she do or feel if she had a m8 that was bi, look at her reaction and if she reacts in a bad way then ask why she would react in such a way. But if she gets suspicious or annoyed then stop.
If she says she wouldn't mind then leave it for a day or two. Then try invting he out again and flirt a little. If she responses in a good way, (flirting back or something) then try and take it further a little. Then do this evrytime you go out or when you're with her. Then she'll get the message and if she doesn't thwen tell her how you feel.
Hope I've helped.
X
A
male
reader, dapone 1  +, writes (30 October 2007):
 Hello.
I am an open minded person so i am not shocked that you are a bisexual, what ever you want to be is O.K, because it is your life and you should enjoy it as much as you can, but not all people are as tolerant as myself, I believe that you should tell your girlfriend, because it is not fair on her , she may believe that you are leading her down the garden path, and when she does find out she will be heart broken, and hate you for breaking her trust.
The problem is if you tell her and she is not broad minded then she will finish with you anyway, this is a loose,loose situation, but to save her heart ache and spare her feelings then it would be best for you to come clean, with her and depending on her response, then you will now ware you stand with with her, honesty in this case is the best policy.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Variety +, writes (30 October 2007):
 Maybe come out as bisexual to her first and see what her reation is. Then you can decide how to act futher. When you say you went out with her was it a date type situation or just as friends? x
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A
female
reader, unknown x +, writes (30 October 2007):
 First of all you MUST talk to her. Find out how she feels about her own sexuality, whether she possibly could be bisexual. Ask her if she would ever consider a relationship with a female etc. If she seems like she could be bisexual and you're absoloutly sure it would not ruin your good frienship by telling her, then tell her. However, if she seems straight and tells you she is, you risk ruining a great friendship with her.
I'm in exactly the same position, and have kept my mouth shut in order to not ruin the frienship, however, if your friend is showing bisexual tendancies, you may be able to tell her.
I know how hard it is for you to see her and not blurt everything out to her, but be strong and take your time.
Mail me privately if you want to chat more.
Hope i have helped. x
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