A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi. My boyfriend and I had a long talk the other day. It was about fantasies, sexual preferences and where your boundaries are.I asked him if he would ever have sex with a man. He replied he has thought about it but decided against it. I asked him because he is very open sexually. And I suspected he might be bisexual. But that answer was interesting to me. It indicates he has some interest in men. Would a straight guy say he thought about doing it with a man? I really do not think the thought would cross their mind, certainly not enough that they would need to think about rejecting it? I am not against gay/bisexual people just so you know. I just don't want a partner who has bisexual curiosities and could one day decide to follow through and break my heart. Based on his response, should I worry? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2021): I think you should be happy that he is open enough to discuss things like that with you! I understand your logic, but I don't think it applies to all people.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2021): Typo corrections and revisions:
"Have you ever had a thought or temptation run through your mind?"
*Revised:
"News flash! Most guys won't admit it, but many men may have wondered what gay-men like and why? You could torture them and they'll never admit it!"
"Does that make you a thief, or a criminal?"
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2021): You're jumping to conclusions and allowing your imagination to runaway with you. You're also sexist, and you're among too many women who can always find something wrong or degenerate in males; because you can't believe we're anything but mindless penises on two legs!!! News flash, most people don't admit it; but many men may have but you could torture them and they'll never admit it! Your boyfriend made the mistake of doing so. Not every man has, but more than you might imagine. The vast majority of heterosexual males will never act on it; because it's only a fleeting curiosity.
Like you've wondered what it would be like being a guy and having a penis! You're human, who doesn't wonder what it's like to be the opposite-sex? Does just a thought mean you suffer from gender dysphoria?
Have you ever have a though or temptation run through your mind. You're in a fine jewelry store. You try on a very expensive ring or bracelet. The fantasy crosses your mind of just running out of the store, or slipping it into your purse when the clerk isn't looking. Does that make you a thief?
You've notice another woman sitting across from you on the subway or a bus; she's wearing a short skirt with her legs spread a little more than necessary. Are you tempted to look? Would you be gay if you did? Have you hugged another female and felt her breasts pressing against yours? Why did you notice?
Your boyfriend has never had sex with a man, or at least he didn't admit he has. All sorts of things can cross your mind that you have no control over. Like wishing someone you loathe were dead, or something terrible would happen to them! That's how your mind works. It is inconclusive that your boyfriend is anything but heterosexual. If everybody admitted exactly everything that crossed their minds, or whatever they've pondered or imagined; it would scare you to death! Yourself included!
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A
male
reader, I'm ANDY  +, writes (6 March 2021):
 Well.In my country,Gay always get attacked from others.But in fact,we only attack something we dislike.if you still love your boyfriend,you should have a talk with him.if you don't love him any more,Just break up with him!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (6 March 2021):
 Should you worry?
I don't think so. MANY people are curious but never try it. Be that sex with same-sex, drugs, bungee jumping, skydiving, etc.
Many straight people never consider it, at all. Some don't consider it until they are asked. Doesn't mean all of a sudden they are out there trying things on for fun.
He thought about it and decided against it. I would have asked why. I think that answer would have been interesting.
You can definitely be BI and NEVER try all "flavors".
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