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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi i am a 17 year old who is going through a rough time with my boyfriend. A few weeks ago i moved away from my boyfriend and it has been the hardest time ever. My boyfriend and I are very much in love and this past weekend i went to visit him. Well on saturday night he recieved a phone call from one of my good friends. so the next day i questioned her about it and i told her not to call him again. later on that night she called me and told me that she they had been calling each other and a few times and he told her some things that werent true. So i questioned him and he told me that they werent true and he had very good excuses for the phone calls and i know when he is lying to me and he wasnt lying. But now i have this in my head and if i ask him more than once he gets mad and that is when i know he is telling the truth. What should i do because i still have this situation in my head. But i know that there is something wrong with her part of the story because she switched it around when she told one of my friends. What should i do?"helpless" Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Aunt Jess +, writes (11 May 2006):
 yes i agree with dazzerg, ask your friend why she was calling him and what was said about you...if she still appears suspicious, calmly mention it agen to your boyf. if it turns out the phonecalls were made becos he misses you, try and let go of the paranoia you are feelin - spend time with them separately and together when you feel comfortable, to reasurre you that they are just friends.
if it turns out there was something going on, dont be too hasty. u need to feel confident in yourself that hes worth all the upset and the lies. onli then will you know whether u shud still be with him. try and be strong, and remember that youve done NOTHING wrong, dont let anyone send u on a guilt trip. any anger they show towards you is simply a reflection of their own feelings - hatred of themselves.
As for your friend, tell her to stick it where the sun dont shine!
wateva happens, i wish u all the luck in the world. message me if you have any more questions, i'll be happi to reply x x x
A
male
reader, Dazzerg  +, writes (10 May 2006):
 Well it would appear that something is being hidden here between the two of them and you do need to get to the bottom of it. There is nothing wrong with calling in my eyes as long as its platonic. To a degree, if he is missing you, it maybe a natural reaction for him to talk to your friend because she is something associated with you.
I think you certainly need to keep an open mind and not make assumptions at this stage because they could be damaging. How about confronting your friend instead of your bf? Maybe when comfronted she will give you the truth. Hope that helps.
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