A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I met a man last year who expressed interest in me. To say we met at the wrong time is an understatement. When we met, I worked for a bully boss and helped take care of my ailing grandmother. Very stressed out during that time.I have since found employment elsewhere. Saw him out one day and he tried to get my attention to talk to me privately, but I was busy assisting my grandmother.He thought I rebuffed him.The next time I saw him he was so rude to me. Tried to explain about work and my grandmother, but he snapped at me and then pretended I did not exist. My sister is a consultant and sees him at a company she frequents. She said he has asked her what I am up to a couple of times. Don't know if he regrets what he did or not. My sister said she saw him out one evening at a restaurant with a woman and they looked like a couple. It wasn't a first date feel she got from them. This is a silly question, but wonder if he regrets what he did. Is he thinking like I am, what if we had gone out? Or am I reading wayyyy too much into this?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (20 October 2014):
 That's really a question for a mindreader :), because ,after all, nobody can know what's actually going on inside his head, so our guesses are no better than yours.
My guess is that, no, he does not particularly regret anything, based on three considerations :
1 ) the person who gets stuck thinking " what if ... " and " what could have been ... " is usually the one who has not got new romantic interests / new things going on in their life. The person who has moved on, and started new " connections ", is focused on the present and the future , not on the past. They are much more into what is GOING TO hapoen, not what has happened already.
2 ) This guy does not sound like a sensitive , considerate person, and not much the type to have regrets... or even understand how his actions affect people. I'd bet he's a bit of " all about me " type. I think that many other guys would have intuitively understood that the moment when you are assisting an ailing grandmother is NOT the moment to ask for your undivided attention. And , even if he had felt rebuffed, well, then you have been tryng to apologize and to explain, - but he was not that interested, he did not even let you finish and just got stroppy. How rude. And entitled.
3 ) He is an adult, and when adult feel they have screwed up, and feel bad about having screwed up- they can use all the wonderful instruments offered by modern technology to say so. In one year time, if at any time he had regretted his behaviour and / or thought you deserved an apology/ an exllanation- he could have called you / emailed you / texted you / Facebooked you etc. He did not, so a reasonable guess is that he does not care a whit about what happened , or not happened, between you.
Neither should you . You can THINK until your brain explodes, but ,without asking him if he has regrets or not ( which I don't think you are going to do ) you will never have a 100% exact answer- which anyway would be suprefluous since it seems he has quite moved on from then. So- if you think about something else, you'll find it less stressful and more profitable.
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