A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi,im not sure what to do about the situation im in. basically me and my brothers friend really like each other and have been texting for a while. we havent been on an official date yet but my brother is all for it and even makes jokes about when we will be giving him nieces and nephews (cringe). im just worried about how things would become if me and my brothers friend actually got involved in a relationship. hes such a great guy but him and my brother do spend quite a bit of time together (and i dont hear from him alot whe they are together) and whenever me an my brother bicker he slags me off to his friend. i just wouldnt want it to end up in a 3rd wheel situation. we really like each other but are both painfully shy in person. i just dont know whether to carry on pursuing him because i feel like my brothers friend would always be forced to pick between the two of us. any opinions or advice would be great :)
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female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (4 May 2011):
 I will just point out the possible problems that might occur. If you did date and then break up, he will probably still be friends with your brother and always be hanging around, which makes it hard to heal a broken heart. Your brother might resent you dating his friend; even if he liked the idea. It might cause a rift between your brother and his friend; most guys are pretty protective of their sisters. It could cause fights about this in your home between you and your brother.
I think that you should not cross the line and date for at least a year and wait and see if you still have feelings after this initial infatuation; at least at that point you can both decide if your feelings are strong enough to risk getting involved with someone who is so closely attached to your brother.
Sorry to be a drag; but I (16) dated my brother's (17) girlfriends brother; and our relationship was never the same after he broke up with her and I was still dating her brother for a short time. Neither of us wound up with them; but our brother/sister relationship was never as close after that...
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