A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:WOMEN ONLY QUESTION............how important to you is sex? 1. I could take it or leave it 2. I love it 3. I only have sex as my partner wants to or 4. I hate it Reply to this Question
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female
reader, DABFIL04  +, writes (10 October 2011):
long term ralatioship4 years
2 love it
i'm usually the oe that starts everything, and since weve been together so long its so cofortable and sexual and amasing:)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2011): Married, 20 years this year.
2. Love it .
However I find that sometimes (actually most of the times) I'm the aggressor, I initiate it. He does as well but perhaps half heartedly (my opinion, he says no)
My hb and I planned a Great sex session last night. He called me while at work to tell me he took some magic pills with him to work, just before he knocks off will take them and by the time he got home....action. When he came home he had a raging......headache bec of the sideeffects of the magic pill. But we tried: watched a bit of porn, tried a bit of action BUT we were just too tired, his head was pounding. We just rolled over and slept. So much for a great night. (Hey but its the thought that counts)
I have (more) orgasms now that when we first got married. Truth be told I guess I didn't even know what the Big O was about then. The sex is better and well we try a lot of things to keep the interest going.
The sex is often bland as well. I guess I'm not that great in bed(???) Perhaps he is not as well. Monotonous But its very frequent. Our sex life helped us save our marriage. We went through a very turbulent 2 years but the sex was the best then. We started experimenting. I guess we were so scared that we were drifting away from each other that we latched on to the sex to help us save each other. It worked!
I've watched porn . Its actually boring. We have both fallen asleep many times while watching it.
For me sex in a loving relationship is just so great. Sometimes I just take it or leave it BUT as I mature, I'm excited by the prospects of still having an active sex life.
I'm only 40, so I hope I get to enjoy until I'm way beyond old.
(Sorry I've written an essay. I was just going to choose option 2 but decided to add more. And for most of you who have read my other responses, you know I am a details person.
(lol)
I also agree with Tisha: what has happened to u men out there? Not knowing what/how to please a woman. Perhaps in sex education in school/college they can run a course on sexual fulfillment for both men and women. For the Guys who told u just plugging it is great sex? And the women: just lieing there not moving at all?
LoveGirl
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (7 October 2011):
 Married.
To be brutally honest, sex has lost it luster after marriage. Don't get me wrong, my husband has been the ONLY man to give me the big O during sexual intercourse...but it has become a bit boring. Maybe it's because we've been actively trying to conceive for a year and a half. So I admit, it's hard not to make it like a job, but you have to put in some sort of "work" to conceive a child. It's not instant, for us at least. And I do encourage sex outside of my fertile window, but it seems as if we don't know how to go about it.
Sex is important to me, especially around my ovulation. For the rest of the month, I could take it or leave it.
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A
female
reader, terilmicks  +, writes (6 October 2011):
Am engaged,
Been having sex with my guy for 4 years now. He was my first and I tawtally love it. I cant do without it..period!!
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A
female
reader, iheartpurple +, writes (6 October 2011):
I love it!! ... except we only get to be intimate when he wants to be, which is faaaaar less than the amount of times I want to do it. Pity. I'm 26.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2011): uhm.. I wouldn't really care about sex as long as I get to kiss/make out with the person I love that is all. Sex wouldn't really matter to me.
it was also depend if I`m married or not because I wouldn't want to have sex with someone I wouldn't want to be with right?
If I did have to really choose, then I would only have sex if my partner wants to because I would want them to be happy and I would really do anything for him. Well I would like it if it wasn't rough ahah
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (6 October 2011):
I'm not married.
It depends on who I'm having sex with:
There's times when I can take it or leave it when I feel the sex isn't that great.
If it's with someone that I have a lot of chemistry with and the sex is really good--then I love it and want to with them all the time.
Also, sex has changed since I was in my early 20's. Now at 27, I enjoy it much more now than when I was younger. When I was younger it was take it or leave it most of the time...now I love it most of the time.
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A
female
reader, charliesdevil73 +, writes (6 October 2011):
 I'm married as of this coming saturday and I love sex with my man. But, he is very giving in that area and will only make it about himself when I tell him I won't finish. I have never hated it, but in some of my past relationships I could have taken or left it.
Why did you post this question if you don't mind me asking?
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (6 October 2011):
 Married.
In my 20s, I could take it or leave it, alternating with I love it.
In my 30s, I love it.
In my 40s, clinical depression make it I could take it or leave it with bouts of I love it and indifference.
In my 50s, back to I love it with some diminishing desire.
How about another option, "I like it, but I wish the guy I was with knew what the hell he was doing?" That would then slot into the 20s spot, as I didn't know much about sex or my body and there were disappointing times when the anticipation was not matched by the actual experience. Generally because the guy thought the vagina was some sort of inside-out penis, which it is NOT.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2011): I'm 30 and dating casually, but no sexual relationship yet.
I'm not sure I like the 4 choices presented here....There's room for all 4 of those options at different moments in a relationship. If you're upset with a guy, you're likely to hate the idea of having sex with him. If you are very comfortable with him and you like him, you might have a session just for his pleasure even if you don't get anything out of it. I guess there's room for ambivalent sex as well as enthusiastic sex in any relationship as well. I think the answer to this question depends at least %50 on the partner you have.
At this point I think I'd go with #2. I've had one relationship where the sex was great all the time and it lasted for a while even if other things between us fell apart. In fact, I think it got to the point where the sex was the only thing we liked about each other. Consequently, I went through a phase where I was convinced sex wasn't important. But, in my last relationship, the sexual connection was pretty weak, but I wanted to stick it out because I liked the guy so much and I was hoping things would get better...And I think I learned the hard way that sex is more important than I thought.
At the moment I've decided that I love sex and don't want to have a relationship without a good sexual connection. That doesn't mean the guy has to be great in bed from the get go, it just means that there's some sort of sexual connection their to grow and develop in the first place.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2011): I'm not married. I think I could take it or leave, good sex is an important factor for a relationship, but it's not the most important thing I focus on.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (6 October 2011):
 I am living with my partner 80% of the time as we transition from two places one in one state one in another... I have been married 3 times.... I am 51 years old.
after age 35 sex became more important. I think asking the age of the respondent is a good idea so I gave you mine
I guess I am going to say I love it. Your options are not quite what I need.
I love it because it makes my partner happy... I love it because the partner I'm with now gives me AFFECTION CONSTANTLY. Having sex with a man who is not affectionate outside of the bedroom is a chore...
I would be happy with an every other day schedule
I prefer mornings but take it when I can get it...
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (6 October 2011):
 I love it. I hated it with other partners because it felt like a chore and their pleasure always came before mine. Like sex was an a performance/favor that I was expected to perform and would get something out of it once in awhile. But with my current partner it feels like something we actually do together (rather than something I do for him) and I always orgasm, so I love it.
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (6 October 2011):
 Not a woman, so i won't speak for them, but I would appreciate it if any respondents would tell us whether they are married or not.
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