We become close quickly but then he got distant!

Tagged as: Dating

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Question - (17 December 2004)

3 Answers - (Newest, 28 May 2006)

A , anonymous writes:

Hi,

I really fell for this man who charmed me, and wined and dined me during a

film shoot we were both working on. We got along great as a work team and

later as friends. After the film wrapped we both went home and continued to

call each other (we live in separate cities). A few weeks later he came to

visit me. We had a great time... Wonderful fun, sex, etc. and, after he left

he called to say he really enjoyed visiting me which was really sweet. The

problem is that I didn't hear from him for almost two weeks. I finally

called him -- he answered, told me he was busy with work and didn't have time

to talk to me and wouldn't for a while. He wasn't 'cold' or anything like

that but, it was clear he didn't want to talk and I felt he was blowing me

off. So, tonight, I sent an email telling him his behavior was not nice and

i didn't want to see him anymore. Do you think I overreacted? It's hard for

me to tell because I was in another relationship over a year ago where the

guy broke my heart and i'm really sensitive to any kind of rejection.

Incidentally, this current guy knows this about me. The other thing that

bothered me during his visit, is that he never really kissed me. He kept

saying stuff like he thought his breath was bad or something... I thought

that was weird; like he was avoiding being intimate.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2006):

oh, please-( to the last answer)- forget that guy, sounds like he's got something else going on somewhere else. i don't doubt that he enjoyed your company and he probably doesn't want to hurt you, but also he may not want to let you go. it's never good to be the secondary girl. i say forget him and move on to someone who really wants to spend time with you. you sound like an interesting fun loving person- i'm sure you'll meet someone else who's more available and attentive to you.

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A reader, vampris, writes (5 January 2005):

Hey... sounds to me like hes scared he`ll hurt u so he`s pushing u away now so that he dosn`t... call him back and tell him he has to make time for u becuase you need to talk.. then tell him how you feel and let him explain.. Love is hard and I wish you the best of luck!

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A reader, Carolyn, writes (3 January 2005):

I would dare to say this was just a fling for him, and you should let him know...and then go and be done with him. I am currently put in this same situation...I plan to write him a letter to tell him how I feel, beings I too feel awkward calling and talking to him. Let it go, and move on. There ARE more awesome men out there.

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