A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: A friend of mine who is in a possessive relationship with a guy for 5 years. There have been many break ups in her relationship but then she patched back. She tells me he controls her and she got slapped by him once in the past. She tells me she has went through a lot of emotional hurt in this relationship. She knows the nature of her relationship but still stays in this relationship because she's afraid she can't move on after breaking up with him and hard to forget him. She also has feelings for me but its on and off and she knows I care so much for her. Now, she doesn't talk to me properly at all and that hurts me because I care so much for her. Her relationship is like, she'll be in good terms with her bf and then a conflict starts then in good terms again and this is the cycle of her relationship till now. Will she be able to end this unhealthy relationship for good?
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male
reader, Pazush +, writes (23 August 2010):
Hi,
i see youre into her, but few things must be certain about.
if her dude gets violent you must Introduce a third-party intervention.
this is not nonsense at all. she might get mentaly (Not to mention physicaly) scars for life. you- who knows about the situation, must do somthing to avoid that.
do not belittle about how much importent is your interference.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2010): If she is still putting up with his abuse after 5 years of a relationship, then, no I dont think she is wants to leave him.
She probably feels that she is useless and unworthy as a human and that the guy she is with is the only guy who would put up with her.
She has to WANT to leave him [you dont say if they are living together], and start over again without him.
Also, bear in mind, some women enjoy this kind of relationship - they need the drama of fights and arguments to keep their relationship interesting....
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A
female
reader, Georgiee +, writes (23 August 2010):
I think that your friend will be able to end this relationship but I think you should give her time because if she is still suffering abuse and she wants to stay with this guy then she must really love him. However if she is staying with him it could be because she is scared. The best thing for you to do is let her know that you are here as her friend and sometimes that is all a girl needs. If you think her situation is gradually getting worse with time then I suggest you talk to one of your friend's family members. I hope that she finally realises that she has a really good friend and it all goes well :)
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