A
male
age
36-40,
*ulldog420
writes:Will my girlfriend of 5 years come back?I have been with this girl for about 5yrs now and just last week she told me she wanted to end it and have time to herself to figure out what she wants, next morning wake up to her wanting me to stay. a couple more days go by and she tells me the samething again, and she tells me im the best boyfriend ever and she loves me and always will so the next night we spent one last night together, went to eat and movies had a great time, made love to her that night and held her in my arms all night. The next day i left she ended up giving me a ride that night and at like 5 in the morning 2 nights later. I got angry with her over the whole situation and kept telling her how i felt and tried getting her to take me back and she just keeps saying she isnt for sure. I text her and try calling but get no response even when i text her tha i love her she says nothing to me. I'm lost on what to do and it hurts so bad this girl has been my everything. Will she end up coming back to me and if so how long will it take?
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male
reader, alternaterealities +, writes (25 November 2010):
 You both obviously have lots of attachments. She has to love you to have spent the past 5 years with you, and that might be why she's kind of iffy and back and forth because she probably doesn't want to hurt you Mate.
Thing can get stale after a long while. You're probably both at the mid 20's age where you start to look at all these different things and wonder what it is you really want and where you want to go and how to get there.
There's nothing that's going to make you feel better. The best you can do is give her the space and give her a chance to miss you. Force yourself to not jump for the phone or respond to txts and emails.
It's the age old... if you love something set it free... if it comes back to you then it was meant to be.
But in the mean time, don't not live your life.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2010): This girl sounds exactly like a friend of mine. My friend had been with her boyfriend for 5yrs. Around the 5th yr she started playing the same game your GF is playing w/you. She'd ask him to leave then called him back and on and on. I think she still "loved" him in a psychotic distorted way, but she was not "in love" with him. She was selfish, vain, arrogant and a b***, so used to the relationship that she was unsure about letting go bc she didn't want to be alone and he was like her safe zone. Basically she was waiting for the BBD...Bigger Better Deal. Her BF was the nicest guy on the planet, he'd do anything for her and you could tell he was madly in love. Of course, she started cheating with guys she thought fit the BBD profile and still kept him around as "the spare". when he found out, he was so heartbroken. He was in terrible shape for a while but eventually he learned to move on with his life. Watch out for this kind of girl!! My advice is just to move on with your life without her. Out there you WILL find the most amazing woman that will make this girl look like a bad dream you were lucky to wake up from. Best wishes.
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