A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm a virgin, but I have been fingered by my ex-boyfriend before and used toys.Anyway, I'm going to stay with a friend next weekend (who I really like) but he lives quite far away.. I'd be really tempted to have sex with him, I think I'd find it difficult not to, especially if things did get heated I feel I'd just want go for it and won't be able to resist him.The problem is, even though I'm ready, I feel I'd regret it if I did have sex with him as I don't think we'll go out (but who knows!) Me and my ex spoke not long ago, we came onto the subject of sex.. and I said I'd be happy to have sex with him.. he said he wouldnt with me as he thinks I'll regret it and that I should lose it with someone I'm in a relationship with. I think it's good of him to say, and I totally agree with him.. but I know I definetly won't regret having sex with him as I still like him, and regret not doing it with him when we went out.I just don't know what to do about the whole thing.. can anyone help me out?Also, as I've used toys does that mean it won't hurt and I won't bleed the first time I have sex and it'll feel more pleasurable?Cheers.
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male
reader, tux +, writes (7 December 2008):
Question answered fully in the first answer.. Way to steal my thunder.. I jest.
anyways, I will concur with DoubleM as well.. It is your choice.. Will you regret it? maybe.. Will you regret it the first time no matter who? maybe.. But I will still say that is your choice and you will have to live with the consequences of the actions to which you have done. The answer to your question will be do whatever you want as long as you can deal with the consequences afterwards. Because many people have regretted losing their virginity, got pregnant, got stds or what not. But on the other hand many of people have enjoyed it as well.. Is it worth the risk? *shrugs*
A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (7 December 2008):
Double M said it all. So true.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (7 December 2008):
You are apparently of legal age and mature development, and if you are anxious to have sexual relations, it will not mean the end of the world. You should realize that your "friendship" with the man may not lead to marriage or even a long-term relationship, and therefore, you relinquish the opportunity to first share your sexuality and your only virginity to a potential future husband and possibly the father of your children in this life. If that is not vital or of concern to you, then the choice is yours to make. You are not the first young woman to choose such a path and become sexual, if that is your decision. But there is no going back. Nobody here can or would want to make this decision for you. It is, indeed, an important decision, but it is entirely yours. If you are not emotionally or financially prepared for motherhood, you should insist on condom protection or initiate birth control and follow the proper procedures. Best wishes.
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