A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well I also have another question. And thank you all who answer! I was pregnant about a month ago. I wanted to keep my baby but everyone around me kinda brainwashed me into thinking it was best to get an abortion. My mom told me it was too hard and said me and my boyfriend are never going to date forever or even get married, being in the situation I was in I was just really letting everything she said get to me. My boyfriend told me that it wouldn't be best for us to keep it because we are too young and it's too hard for us. I wanted to keep it. So after everyone convincing me to get an abortion I did, on March 11th (2 days after my boyfriends birthday) So when I was all done with the procedure I felt extremely guilty and wished I didn't do it, and had done what my heart wanted. Now I just find myself crying and really depressed when I think about it. Will I always feel like this or will I get over it?
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female
reader, imaginary friend  +, writes (3 April 2009):
how dreadful to be pressured into such a thing,unfortunately many girls have been in your shoes.I hope you can forgive yourself and learn not to let people inflict theyre ideas/will upon you in the future two girls i know had an abortion funnily enough they both went on to have twins in the following pregnancy you will have opportunities in the future to have a baby or many but for now whats done is done now there is no point dwelling on iPr
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2009): hi, you may not see this now, bu the termination was the best thing. It is too soo, so yes cry and cry again at what happened but know this, you will heal from this. it will take you some time please know that you did the best in the given situation. you are mounrning the loss of what could have been, just please be strong and take time out and heal. if you need to go to conselling, please do , also please let the porple aronud you, love and comfort you. please do not reject their love.i wish you all the best and THANK YOU TO everyone who has posted here. I think with time you will heal and also forgive yourself. Just know that you are loved.
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A
female
reader, audie  +, writes (3 April 2009):
 its only natural that u feel that way. wat u need to do now is start on a journey towards forgiving your self and lettng go of the guilt. the deed is done and you cant undo it. you can however try to move on. get proffessional counselling if you must or talk to someone close you think can help you get through this.
next time you r faced with such a life altering decision do wat ur gut tells you.
xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2009): You feel like this now, but eventually the rawness of these emotions will subside and it will begin to sink in that you did the best thing.
Of course you are overwhelmed by the thought that you have effectively terminated what could have been a whole new person, a whole different life for you, a completely different path. But that's natural. New mothers often feel just like you do - freaked out, overwhelmed, a little in shock.
Think of all the stress you have saved yourself, emotionally and financially, and the trouble you have spared your child. Then think of how you can wait and build something more solid and secure later on, when you are more ready.
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (3 April 2009):
 For what it's worth, I really think you did the right thing, all things considered. But I know your feeling of loss. You made a tough decision, and no, a lot of these feelings won't go away for quite some time, if ever, but they should lessen.
I really feel that you should seek grief counseling. Your situation is unique in that you actively wanted this baby and were pressured into terminating the pregnancy. I personally am pro choice, and really wish that young teen mothers would opt for abortion, but it still has to be a choice, bottom line.
You can even seek counseling from a pastor or minister if you belong to a church, and I believe most of them offer their services for free. Also, if you are in college they should offer counseling services.
It does get better for those of us who lose our children, I do promise that. You just have to tread water for a little while and keep your head up.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2009): Im so sorry u had to experience this, i also went through the same thing nearly two years ago,and my boyfriend outright told me he didnt want it and treated me really badly, it was a horrible time i was depressed for ages, everytime i looked at someone elses child i would imagine it was my child and how it would look etc., it took me a while to get over it, u will get over it trust me but it will take time,it still crosses my mind but i have learn to deal with it, and have made sure that i NEVER put myself in that position again, u should also, and if it does happen again u must remember it is ur decision to make and live with never let anyone make it for u, u have ur family and friends support, i didnt have anyone, because i chose to keep it a secret,TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS AND IF NOT FULLY,IT WILL HEAL ENOUGH THAT U CAN GO ON WITH UR LIFE...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2009): Hi honey, I've been through the same situation. Basically, in a practical sense, I believe you did the right thing for yourself and your potential child. In terms of the world of emotions - where we tend to not be so practical - you made an incredibly difficult choice and you are only reacting like a normal, well-adjusted human being.
It's ok to feel sad - it is a great loss, but it is also an affirmation that you are now going to be dedicated to making sure that you do not get pregnant again until you are ready - emotionally AND financially - to give your child the best possible life without totally sacrificing your own opportunities.
You need to look to the future and think about what an amazing life you will create for yourself, which you can then share with a child and his or her father!
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