A
male
age
36-40,
*ndy00
writes:Hi.A little while after my girlfriend split with me (after 2 years of being together), I found that talking to her was always difficult. I'd had (sn still have) many emotions and feelings that I couldn't give her. I couldn't tell her that I loved her anymore.After a particuarly bad conversation over the internet, I suggested that we don't speak for a while. It gives me the chance to help settle how I feel about her, and when that happens, we can talk again. When I first suggested it, she said that she wasn't "Bothered" (Which I thought was pretty cold). The 2nd time I suggested that we talk about it, that was the last time I spoke to her, and she to me. Nothing was discussed, she just didn't message me again.It's been.. Probably, nearly a month now and we haven't spoke. My feelings are easing VERY SLIGHTLY, and I'm now wondering when I should try and start conversation again. It would be nice to stay friends after all.. Maybe it just isn't possible. I want to talk, but right now I know that I'm still too hurt and still too much in love with her to be just her friend.Will I ever lose my feelings enough for us to talk like we used to? Will I ever be able to talk to her again? I'm not sure I can handle hearing about what's going on in her life. I don't ever want to know about her love life, and that's something that I'm certain to hear about when we speak... I just want her to be mine again.Please off your advice.*Note: There's no chance of us meeting up to talk about this at any time, because she is currently at University, 3 hours away. Our relationship was, and always has been a long distance relationship. We met 13 times over the 2 years.
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long distance, the internet, university Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Marktheblue +, writes (26 October 2011):
Something similar has happened to me. I pretty much begged for another chance and pressured her, Eventually she went to HR (We work in the same Office) and will not communicate with me at all. I am so in love with her despite this after nearly 5 months after the split. I don't have the answer but I can't move on while I have the feelings for her. It's making me ill.
A
male
reader, Andy00 +, writes (19 September 2007):
Andy00 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank-you for your comments everyone.
I'm still pretty cut up by all this. Does anybody know when/if I should try to talk to her again?
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A
female
reader, Ears4tears +, writes (15 September 2007):
 Its the hardest thing in the world to fall in love, it fills you with so many emotions that you never thought you could feel and its enhanced ten times over when your relationship breaks apart.
As they say time is a good healer, i know it dont feel like it right now but be assured you will be ok. Maybe when you have both had time to clear your heads you can then become friend, but if not wish her happyness in her life and move on to be happy in yours.
Chin up darlin, and keep smilin
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2007): hello, i know exactly what you are going through. me and my girlfriend have broken up and its been a month i cant stop thinking about her and havnt ate or slept properly. We work togther and see her every other day. We are frinds now and tahts better than being without her. I will be honest and believe we will get back together ans I know she just needs some time apart. My advice to you is talk to her, if you want things to work out between yourselves talk to her be nice and understand that she is hurting and just because she doesnt talk to you properly doesnt mean she doesnt care. Talking to her will help you understand why things didnt work out and who knows maybe the time apart has done her some good and might be needing someone close to her to talk to her. Good luck matey I hope things get better.
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A
female
reader, ***** +, writes (15 September 2007):
me and my ex-boyfriend split 3years ago even though we havent seen each other since whenever i see his picture if hear his name i panic because ive still got feelings for him! i do phone him every so often and its soo hard for me because he acts like nothing happend but trust me talking to your ex-girlfriend will help you alot to understand why things ended, the more you talk to her about other things you will have lost your feelings for her im not saying you will ever forget her because you might not but it does get easy! try the cool calm approch towards her you neverknow it might work. you need to go out and meet new people tahts another way to try and forget your feelings for her!!!
let me know how it goes ***** x
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A
female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (15 September 2007):
 i split up with my boyfriend about 4 months ago and at the time, i was heartbroken. although it was slightly different to your circumstances, i felt my world was falling apart around me and i ended up in hospital. so i understand how you feel and it's not easy, the feelings don't just magically disappear overnight, but i found the only way to resolve it and move on was to cut all contact, just while you try and move on. you are obviously both unhappy otherwise she would have contacted you by now. good luck.
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