A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Joseph and I dated a while ago, from January to March. That was his first real relationship and his longest. Since then, we haven't been seeing each other and are still involved on a more than friendly level. The last time I asked him when we were going to go out again, he said when he gets a job and if school isn't hard. That was June. I saw him yesterday and tried to kiss him, and he said he wasn't going to kiss me until I finish school. He's a college freshman, and I'm in eleventh grade. If someone refers to me as his girlfriend, he won't say anything, and if we run into some friends he will put his arm around me. He said he loves me in a way that he wouldn't want to live without me and he can't say he's in love with me because he "doesn't want to speak out of turn". He also said love and relationships bring hurt and are a distraction. When we were together he would only see me once a month because he said relationships aren't supposed to be important at this age. Is he ever going to be in love with me? He said love takes time, but I wonder how much. He's the kind of guy who never trusts anyone and is very to himself. I've gotten very close to him and he's beginning to trust me. I want so badly to be with him. All I want to know is, if he will ever be in love with me. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, mrg123  +, writes (23 August 2011):
 Well when he says relationships bring hurt and distraction it sounds like he3 speaks from experience and it seems to me that is what is causing him to be hesitant, it sounds like he has been burnt before and is still dealing with that. It sounds like to all intents and purposes he does love you but isnt willing to make that final leap. Breaking down the barriers caused by his past experiences will take time, and you will have to be paiternt with that I think, you cant force things like this and if you try too it will make things worse and maybe even push him away?
Maybe you should try and talk to him gently about his past and encourage the process to move forward but I think patience has to be your watchword here. If you love this guy then be willing to take the time needed and I am totally confident that in time you will be rewarded with love returned. Good luck :)
A
male
reader, dominic pusel  +, writes (23 August 2011):
 this guy is over protective for some reasons best known to him, i think from what you have said this guy is realy in love with you but he is still taking out time to study you since he just dont whant to fall into the wrong hands. My advice is continue to be that lovely friend you are and before long things will take a turn.
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