A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:please need advice ok I have a best friend and at the time he is with some one else so we got together and then it happened. well he still with her and wanting to leave her for me. is this going to happen to me? I am worried. I don't want to lose him in that way as a bf I feel bad enough already we did this but now hes leaving her to be with me. can anyone help with a advice please? will he cheat on me?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (4 March 2014):
 If his MO is to go from one woman to another before ending the prior relationship, then it's more than likely he will do the same thing to you....
he's with her,
he got with you
now he wants to leave her to be with you... so he is already a known liar and a cheater.
will you ever trust him when he says "I'm busy" and you can't verify what he's doing or who he's with?
what makes it so different for you? do you think because he's your "best friend" it makes a difference? IT doesn't.
Even if he does not cheat ON YOU, how he got to you was via lying and cheating. He's proven he CAN lie and cheat... again I ask... will YOU EVER TRUST HIM?
A
male
reader, Gauntlet  +, writes (4 March 2014):
 That sort of cheaters should be named a "Tarzan" because they are used to jump from liana to liana. You are about to become the next liana... and it's just a question of time before you become the previous one. Sorry, but that's how life works. And yes, sometimes life stinks. A lot.
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A
female
reader, Sensible Alice  +, writes (2 March 2014):
 If he can cheat with you, he can cheat on you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2014): Well he hardly has any incentive not to cheat on you. If he leaves her for something shinier then it'll confirm to him that it works. If something even shinier than you comes along then he can ride off into the sunset with her behind your back too.
Don't worry, OP, I'm sure he'll sell you a load of shit how you're the most amazing person ever and he couldn't do that to you and you'll believe him but that possibility will never leave your mind. You'll always have to look over your shoulder because you know what he's capable of, but it's fine, you're also capable of that too so you're kind of made for each other.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 March 2014):
 Chances are he will. The fact that you can't trust him NOW as a "not BF" means you can't if he WAS your BF.
Why do you even have sex with a guy who has a GF? Why is that OK, but not OK for him to cheat if he was YOUR bf? Where does that come from?
It's OK for YOU to sleep with him, but if he DATES you, no other woman can?
Think a little, try a dose of common sense.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2014): Cheating is when you're with someone and then do dingdong with someone else, but don't leave your current person for that person. So, it's half cheating in your case, and only time can tell if he'll cheat on you. has he done this to other girls? if he has, then it's likely he'll do it to you. but if he's serious he may not do it to you, but there is still that possibility.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2014): "he still with her and wanting to leave her for me."
That's what he's telling you. She's hearing a whole different story. If he was going to leave her for you then he'd leave her for you, not tell you he's leaving her for you.
"is this going to happen to me?"
No, because he's not going to leave her for you. He stands nothing to gain because you have nothing more to offer than what he's already getting from you. Why buy the cow when the milk is free, and why milk only one cow when two are available?
"will he cheat on me?"
Technically, he can't. Since he has no intention of leaving his girlfriend then if he has any other pieces on the side besides you that would constitute serial cheating on her.
But in broader terms you knew he was a liar and a cheater when you hopped into bed with him, so you should know that any guy who is capable of cheating on his wife or girlfriend is certainly capable of cheating on his back alley mistress.
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