A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Should I leave my 2nd wife?She and the kids from the 1st wife don't click well at all, I've tried so many things but noting helped, the kids stay with us every Sunday, by Sunday evening she always bitch to me about them, so my week is always massed up since my energy goes to her and the kids, not to my business, so for the past few years my business as gone down hill,Most of my thoughts are about letting go of every thing and just run away to start a new life, we do have kids together as well but I don't see it as a stop sign at all, I feel like she's trying to turn me in to Mr mom, I'm a business man who love to work and now as if I'm being jailed, Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (18 January 2010):
She knew you had the kids when she said yes to marriage. Honest Answer and Piktopaz both are speaking words of wisdom.
Yes, they might be being little rotters for her, ask her, if they are all of you, thats all four of you, can sit down and discuss what's happening in the family.
If she is just being a bitch, or if they are coming to your place and you are leaving them for your wife to deal with, entertain, dicipline, love etc, then you need to look at your actions, or she needs to look at hers.
A
male
reader, Honest Answer +, writes (18 January 2010):
I know exactly where you are coming from. My wife is the sweetest woman in the world, but when it comes to the ex, she can really bring out her claws. I too have a child from my ex and I too was in the situation you currently find yourself. Here is what I did:
I talked to my wife and let her know that there were two important people in my life. One was my son, and the second was her. I explained that my son was the innocent one in this puzzle.
When I married my wife, it wasn't like I kept my past from her. She knew that I had a child, and that the child was my number one priority in life.
I told her that she either accepted me and my son, or she could find the door. There was no room for compromise in my mind. None of the "when your son comes over, I will leave the house." When she married me, I was a package deal. The good, the bad, and the ugly.
Skip to today.......All is really good. I am currently deployed to Iraq, and over the Summer my son came down for his vacation. Just him and the wife.
I know that I am lucky now, but it wasn't always this way. I really had to get it through my wife that I loved her with all my heart, but I wasn't going to abandon my son.
Good Luck!
Jeff
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A
female
reader, Angzw +, writes (18 January 2010):
It depends on how old the kids are and what do they do that's so terrible? Can you give more information?
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (18 January 2010):
Have you told her any of this? If not, she needs to know. Maybe you can find out then if your wife is being unreasonable and just bitching because that's what she likes to do or if it's out of jealousy; or perhaps she doesn't like them because when you're not looking they're defiant or rude but you think they're perfect angels. That way hopefully you can come to a common ground and figure out if it's something you need to work on with your wife or with your kids.
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