A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend said he doesn't like giving me oral sex and i didn't ask why because i was embarrassed.. why do you think he wouldn't like it?? I like it!!??
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2008): well in my opinion if you're to embaressed to ask him questions and talk openly about oral sex then u probably shouldn't be doing it. Having said that .. it could probably be a number of different reasons .. 1) maybe its a bit hairy and he doesnt like it.Perhaps a trim or a shave would help...2) it mite be an odd taste and something he doesnt particularly like. However if he truely loves you and is doing it to make you feel nice then he might remmeber that his cum doesnt always taste the best either. i suppose the difference is that a girl can give head without having to swallow or even taste his cum if they dont want to, but a guy has no choice.. 3) Maybe he is a little unsure whether he's doing it right and for girls it takes much longer to orgasm, maybe he is thinking all this effort and no reward. Maybe you need to talk to him as he does it and tell him what feels nice and let him know he's doing everything right , maybe he jsut needs to go a little longer. You guys need to commmunicte and if you cant then you certainly should NOT be engaging in such close intermate sexual relations. I hope that helps :)
A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (9 February 2008):
 A douche became popular back in the 1950s and 1960s as a way for a woman to supposedly better clean her privates, then often using an enema bag (rubber container} with a hose and a perforated plastic insertion tube to essentially "flush out" her vagina using warm water or certain solutions on the market.
To a large degree, I think it was more another way to sell products than to benefit a woman, because it is really not a good idea for a healthy woman to do this. It rids the vagina of most of the natural things (fluids, etc) that make up a healthy vaginal environment, and throws everything out of balance down there.
Only under certain medical conditions and if prescribed by a good gynecologist should this be considered. Keep it normal.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2008): What is a douche or douching?
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A
female
reader, korculan queen  +, writes (9 February 2008):
Usually when a guy won't go down on you it is because he does not care for you. Of all the guys I have been with it was always the players and the control freaks who refused to go down but always wanted you to come to the party with him. My theory is if you are not getting what YOU want then go somewhere else and get it. My ex husband was a control freak and went down 3 times in 7 years yet I always did my bit so to speak. Needless to say he is my ex now and I am in a much better place in that my boyfriend tells me all the time how sweet I taste and how much he wants to go down on me. My ex husband was a violent, controlling abuser who deprived me of sex because he stated I was cheating, yet he had my complete 24hour day monitored down to the minutes it would take to drop the kids off at school and then come straight home again without stopping.You have two choices put up with it or find a guy like I did that is a REAL MAN and loves it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2008): My boyfriend described it as gram-crackerish, but a tiny bit more salty, and after the first two times he did it to me, he said it was sweeter. It's an aquired taste.Make sure you're not using creams, douches (other than vingegar water by Summer's Eve), scented tampons, etc. Use a TINY bit of soap on a warm wash cloth when cleaning your cooch, and rinse it well. If you shave up down there, rinse WELL. Make sure you clean around your clitoral hood where bacteria can breed... And ask your man why he doesn't like doing it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2008): Maybe you could get some flavored lube for him to put on you that wouldn't irritate you down there.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (8 February 2008):
Some men have the misguided perception that a girl's private area is somehow nasty, smelly or otherwise dirty. Of course, it is nothing of the sort if she is healthy, clean and balanced.
But the vagina CAN get out of balance and become unpleasant. Common reasons may include use of harsh bath soaps, oil-based lubricants and douching, any of which may cause the normal healthy mix of vaginal chemicals and hormones, including good bacteria, to become out of balance. Too much cleansing may also create the problem.
The answer is NOT to douche, use low or neutral Ph soaps (such as Basis) down there, and only water-based lubes if really needed.
And of course, sexually transmitted diseases, such as chlamydia, or infections such as yeast and trichomonaisis can make things unpleasant down below.
But your guy, in my opinion, just has a hang up about it.
Tastes a bit like yogurt to me and many men enjoy doing it.
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A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta  +, writes (8 February 2008):
 because most guys are small minded and think that going down on women is... something they shouldn't have to do.basicly lots of guys won't do this on women.. for many reasons. personally i love doing it. i think i was a lesbian in a former life.its nothing personal, but you should ask him why. and hey.if he won't do it for you. don't do it for him.
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A
female
reader, happyholly +, writes (8 February 2008):
Maybe he has not done it before and he finds it easier to say he doesn't like it. Maybe he feels he is not very good at it, or maybe he has and did not like it. Give him a bit of time and i am sure as you speak more and learn more about each other the reason will show its self. Just because you like it does not mean he has to. He may never do this, so you have to at some point decide if you need this in your sexual life or can you live without it. I guess you're embarrassed to ask and he is embarrassed to tell. You could write a letter and ask, but I think leave it for a while and see what happens. Good luck, hope this helps a little, Hollyx
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A
male
reader, Moviefan +, writes (8 February 2008):
 It could be several things. If you dont shave and have hair down there he could very well dislike having hair in or near his mouth. I dont mean anything mean by this but if you are not the cleanest down there that can be a major turn off for some guys while others like it. I remember one of my friends didnt like doing it because of that. But the best option is just to ask him that way you will know exactly why and you will not have to specualte. We could be wrong. Get past being nervous and ask him thats the best option.Good Luck
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