A
female
age
30-35,
*rincess166
writes:my partner and i of 3 years occasionally hold hands when we are out and about but not for very long periods of time. he will grab my hand when we are crossing the road and will let it go after a while or if hes in the mood he will hold my hand if we're walking down the street. which is fine with me since i wouldnt want to be holding hands constantly. but he's not consistent with it and i feel he doesnt want to do it because he doesnt want to be seen as 'unavailable'. last night while we were walking, i was wearing heels and was unable keep up with him, so was holding onto his arm with both of my hands for support. he said "i prefer this a lot more than you holding my hand, i know that you would love to hold my hand all the time but its not really my thing." why would he prefer for me to hold his arms rather his hand???
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female
reader, Lexie88 +, writes (9 August 2011):
 I don't think you have anything to worry about. My partner and I never hold hands while walking. Neither of us likes it. The hands get sweaty and it makes it hard to walk sometimes. I'll hold on to his arm, sometimes he'll put his arm around my waist and so on. It works better for us.
The fact that your partner is happy for you to hold onto his arm says to me that he's happy to be seen with you and has no intentions of projecting to others that he's single.
Since you've been together for 3 years, I'd think it'd be easy for you to mention this to him as a conversational point.
Bottom line is...nothing to worry about :)
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (8 August 2011):
 Hmm...is he a germophobe? Many people who are scared of diseases or germs will wash hands frequently and dislike holding hands. He could be afraid of becoming sick! That's usually the cause of a dislike for hand-holding. I tend to think this because he likes you holding his arm, so it doesn't sound like he's bothered by the display of intimacy. A woman on his arm gives just as "unavailable" a vibe as hand holding.
Personally, I hold hands with my husband, but I do feel really special if I'm on his arm. I think it's very intimate and a little bit regal to do it.
Of course, the best thing to do is simply to ask him what bothers him about it. I'm guessing you've tried to in the past due to the "I know that you would love to hold my hand" comment.
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