A
female
age
30-35,
*anura
writes:So long story short, there was a guy in high school who had a crush on me but never did anything about it.5 yrs later I message him on fb we hit it off and hes super intrested, we arrange a date and he blows me off, I tell him you had your chance by, for the next 2 yrs I get messages like 'hey hows it going' finally he message saying I had a dream about you last night and I just blocked him.5yrs later I'm on a dating website and he pops up and says hey long time no see, again we hit it off realizing we have more in common than ever,and talk for hours we have a date to meet up the next day both desiring that'we just have to meet and get to know each other properly' he backs down saying hes tired, we both only got 3 hour sleep so that's ok we arrange again for today, he has now blown me on and not responding to my messages or even seen them but he has been on the dating webside.I'm not too bothered or hurt, I just dont understand, why would a guy who is so happy to seem me and talk to me not want to meet up with me?
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (21 June 2020):
 I'm with FA, he either has a partner of sorts OR he has massive issues/baggage that you REALLY don't want to deal with.
And I see red flags galore.
First of all WHY would you reach out to someone to someone who "supposedly" had a crush on you 5! years earlier? He did nothing about it then, what do you think would happen 5 years later? Sure, he could have matured a little, still..
What kind of person TROLLS in people they have had NO contact with for 5 years for a date? If that sounds blunt, I'm sorry, I just don't get it. There are MILLIONS (quite literally) other men you could look at as a dating option. It's like guys who go through their "little black book of past hook ups or girls they KNEW were into them" in hopes of "scoring" some random casual sex.
But I digress.
He "randomly" found you on a dating site? I have doubts.
10 years ago he didn't approach you even though he had a crush, 5 years ago he blew you off, and again, this year, he blows you off TWICE. How many times are you going to chase after a guy who CLEARLY isn't as INTO you as you are INTO him? And how much MORE time are you going to waste on a guy who CLEARLY (and I'm going by his ACTIONS here) think so little off you that he just blows you off?
I mean HOW many times are you going to smack your head into the brick wall before you realize that it will hurt EVERYTIME you do that?
You know the saying:
“Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
Think about it.
BLOCK HIS SORRY ass, remove, delete, unfriend etc. etc. CUT him off and MOVE on with your life. If you want a BF/partner HE isn't it. Look for someone who wants to go on a date with you even if he is super tired because he is so excited to see you and get to know you. Look for someone who will INVEST in you, emotionally. Look for someone who is WORTH your time.
I know it's not so great to feel rejected but how many times do you need him to SLAP you in the face? Can you NOT understand that YOU can't MAKE him interested in you? If he isn't REALLY available or interested?
TAKE the hint, OP He isn't REALLY interested in meeting up or dating you. He is just liked the idea of getting his ego stroked by having you chase him for 10 years.
Come on. This is easy.
Have a higher standard for what you want in a partner.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2020): I agree with FatherlyAdvice. I might even add that he may no loner look like he did back in high school. His financial situation may not be that great; and he's too ashamed to make an actual appearance.
I also agree with FelidaeOBX, I would block him. He just wants to be pen pals/chat-buddies; and that's not what you're looking for. He's a waste of your time.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (21 June 2020):
 He is married. or otherwise engaged.
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