Why won't he pay me any compliments?

A female age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I have been with my boyfriend for 4 months now, but he has never paid me a compliment. I have often made a considerable effort to look really nice for him, but he doesn't seem to notice. I spoke to him about this a couple of weeks back, and told him that it would be great if he noticed when I had made an effort or told me if he thought I looked pretty sometimes, but he just shrugged it off and didn't really say anything. I pay him compliments often, telling him is has nice eyes, nice bum, that kind of thing, but he never ever says anything back. This may sound trivial, but I am beginning to wonder whether he is being like this on purpose, to make me a little insecure. I am told by others that I am attractive and I get asked out quite alot, although I don't tell him this as he is quite jealous of other men. Any advice gratefully accepted!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 October 2008):

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