A
female
age
41-50,
*obme
writes:My guy and I are truly connected in mind alot and know alot of how the other is feeling and stuff like that. I know we both are clairvoyant too. Well we have been fine and are doing great so far one thing is bothering me that I have talked to him about twice so far. I cant use some forms of birth control and right now I am not on any birth control and I have told him that. He refuses to take measures in not getting me pregnant and that is unsettling to me so much that I didn't have sex with him one night in fear of a pregnancy. Well now I am scared too. We had awesome passionate truly emotional sex last Sunday and afterwards one thing I thought of is uh oh..what if I get pregnant?? I got scared and yesterday at work as I noticed a little dried blood in my undies..I thought oh no! I am hoping that is not breakthrough bleeding!! I have been very open about our sex-life and birth control telling him he needs to do something about it so we don't get pregnant! There was a huge possibility that the last time we had sex I was ovulating. I am terrified and I need to tell him again on Thursday we need to have some form of birth control period. Why would he dismiss birth control and accept a pregnancy? He says well he doubts I would if we are only together 2 times a week.. Hello it takes 1 time!! I said. He changed the subject..We have open communication about everything but that I have seen. I wouldn't mind of having a last child but not anytime soon either!! I would rather him and I be living together and married for that one to happen. I know I need to take control of the situation and I cant financially til next month. I am going on something and fast!! How do I explain my true fears of a pregnancy to him? Is he just not taking me serious on that possibility? Help guys if you all can!!
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female
reader, Skeez  +, writes (20 March 2008):
 He sounds like a typical man to me. Perhaps he really doesnt understand about pregnany and Birth control which is where your going to have to make him understand. Take him to a clinic and get some leaflets. Also...i noticed that you said you couldnt go on 'some' birth control. There are plenty of options out there for everyone and theres a very low chance that you couldnt possibly take any of them. If pills are not a good idea you can always get an implant. Theres one where you have it placed in your arm and another in your womb (i think, not to sure). But if want to stop worrying about becoming preganant but still want the sex then go to your GP and ask for a birth control that is suited for you. You should also mention why you cant take some birth control, becuase that way you will be able to get some better answers from other people.
But in the meantime, talk to him. No matter how many times you have to say it, keep saying it, until he gets it in his head. Have you also thought that perhaps he wants another baby but is just to scared to ask you becuase he knows how you feel about it.
Goodluck
A
female
reader, Jmo +, writes (18 March 2008):
 I'm not sure of what contraceptives you can't use, and I won't ask. I'm assuming however, that you are capable of using SOME type of contraceptive seeing as how you used the word "some". Regardless, you should remember that YOU are in control of your body and despite your boy's thoughts on the issue, you have a responsibility to yourself. In the meantime, I think you need to educate your boy on how, yes, it only takes one time. I don't want to put any messed up ideas in your head but do you think there's a possibility he wants to get you pregnant?
-Jmo
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