A
male
age
51-59,
*elieve in loyalty
writes:Hi all, Could someone good kind people give their option please on this matter, is it an issue or it that I've got the issue, and I'm being stupid. Please tell me if I am. I'm gay, I met this wonderful guy 6 months ago, older than me, but that's my preference...Bottom line, he's still on a gay dating site, I've deleted mine, don't need them, don't want them, although I would definitely wouldn't be temped, because I believe in loyalty and one on one only. He still kept his, I hate it, it's could not saying it would, lead to temptation???Why can't he just delete it. We are planning things together, me change my job, and move in together soon 6 months or something, he said he wants it right as he's been let down exs cheating on him, he knows just knows I ain't like that, and I know he knows. But....I've hits keys to his house so can come as I please he says, but we do live a distance (40 miles) away. To all purchase, we are sharing each other's lives. But me only coming Friday evening until Monday morning. He said last night he's been thinking, and when I get my new job he'll delete the site, I said what difference should a job make, and if you cared it would go, I told him I really wanted it to go, I hate that he's still got it, but he said not yet,??? He still has friends on it going back 14 years and there just pen pals, he's never met them, I do believe him, I do believe he's not a cheater, he's is so kind, we get on so so well, we do love each other so so much. I just thing that what if...what if Mr Perfect popped up, that's my worry, theres can always be temptation...can't they. I just want to know please if I'm the one being selfish or he. And if you think it is ok for him to keep, he has edited the profile to partnered and friendship and chat only....but still doesn't stop people, and we know the selfishness of people out there, they only want one thing, and not both if they destroy relationships. Kind regards S Reply to this Question
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male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (7 November 2016):
Let me make this simple...
You believe in loyalty...He is loyal to the the dating site, his friends on there, and maybe even the possibility of meeting someone else.
See anything yet? You are loyal to one on one...He is loyal to everyone... Does that sound like someone who matches your ideals?
So the best thing to do is, to sit there and stress about someone who does have what you need. This guy is it...no other men out there that could possibly give you what you want??
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (6 November 2016):
 I think it's a silly excuse saying it is to talk to friends he has had on there for years, because if they where friends then he would find another way to contact them. For me it would not be acceptable.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2016): If your in a relationship then no-one should have a profile on a dating site even if its 'friends' or 'pen pals' theres other ways to keep in touch with people - facebook , phones , emails. Personally id be telling him if this relationship means anything the profile will be deleted and if he wants to keep his 'friends' then do so by the ways ive suggested . If hes not willing to do that then what else is he willing not to do . Having keys to his house is all good but you dont live together 24/7. Its all about trust too , sounds like you dont trust him. Doesnt matter that hes told you hes on the site chatting to 'friends' and hes open about it , if i was in your shoes id be mad and say its the dating profile or me
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (4 November 2016):
 http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-put-a-profile-on-a-website-and.html
This sounds very, very similar therefore I think you're asking the same question and hoping for different advice.
You received some good answers last time and I think you know deep down what you want to do but you don't have the balls to.
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