A
female
age
36-40,
*eslie1
writes:my boyfriend got his ex girlfriend pregnant while we were together i forgave him his son is now 6 months old and he goes to her house to see him..he says he doesnt want to tell his ex-girlfriend about us because she hates me and wont let him see his son because of me...i dont understand why he cant just tell her i dont like that he hides me he gets angry with me if i pick her phone call up because he says i only bring problems and that affects him to see his son should i be worried that something is goin on between them?? why wont he tell her about us?
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female
reader, loria  +, writes (5 August 2008):
My ex boyfreind kept me a secret for quite awhile then she found out he went over to her house to see the kids me being niave I believed it until one day she said well you to must be very happy and in love but what kind of a man is he if hes f___ing you and me at the same time be careful and go with your gut its usally right adn dont let your heart think right now use your brain its always right good luck
A
female
reader, HonningKanin  +, writes (3 August 2008):
 Without knowing who you boyfriend is there are two possibilities and this cold be a potentially delicate issue.
1. Your parenter could be in total fear that his ex could try and keep his child away from him and is one of the reasons he is keeping quiet about the issue so that he can continue to see his child. What he needs to understand though is that he has every rigt to see his child and can go through the courts to have his rights clearified and he will no longer have need for this woman to bully him into that situation.
Ask him to really think about it. If he continues to just give in to see his hild, this other woman is using the child to control him and he will need to take that control away from her. It is for the best that he tries to gain legal access to the child so that he is free of this womans influence.
2.(I hope this is not the case) He doesn't want her to know you two are together so that he can continue to have his cake and eat it. He may still want relations with this woman.
I would recommend you never ask your boyfriend to choose between his child and you ecause that is an unfair battle. One you may lose and one you may not wat him to choose. If he did choose you over his child, what woman wants a man wo can discard his child like that?
I would however suggest, if his arguement is he wants to see is child, to look for legal assistance to secure his role in his childs life. That way you two can be public to your liking and his ex will have no upper hand to control your boyfriend.
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