A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have been seeing this guy who owns his own business and is always crazy busy, he is a client of mine that we hit it off from the begining. We have a connection to each other that is so overwhelming to me it makes me weak everytime i think about him. I can tell he feels the same way when we are on the phone and in person. We talk every day through the week sometimes 2-3 times a day, we get toghether about 1-3 times a week. I noticed it got to a point where I was the one calling him all the time so i stopped calling him and went for 3 days wo hearing from him. He called me on the 4th day wanting to know if i was mad at him, i said no but really was. From then on he calls me most of the time.....On the weekends I dont hear from him at all unless i call him. I know he is busy (he is on call on SAT and Sun) and he does work all the time but i think if he loves me like he says he does he would find time to call me on Sat and Sun. It is like clockwork on Monday he will call me and tell me how much he missed me and sounds truly sincere, on fridays he tries to make sure we get together or talk a lot so its like he is preparing NOT to see me. I dont understand why this is and need an objective opionion. I make myself crazy every weekend thinking about this. I have never told him i love him but he tells me every time we talk or see each other, he is very sweet and worries about me going places by myself and acts like he wants to take care of me. Sometimes i feel like his actions on the weekends speak louder than his words through the week. What could be up with him, I dont think he is seeing someone else but now I am starting to wonder. One thing that I cant beleive that he is seeing someone else is the fact (I am not bragging) I am a very attractive sexy girl, I get hit on all the time. This guy is 10 years older than me and is probably the least attractive person i have ever went out with...pretty much saying that I could do better than him and he knows it because he says it. I just cant figure him out please give me your thoughts Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionUPDATe, at the first of the week i was leaning towards the "someone else" theory. With this thought in my head I reacted differently to him and he picked up on it. It immediately put him on the defense and had him calling me every couple of hours just to talk. We met yesterday to eat lunch and he suggested we get together on Saturday so that we would not be interrupted as much by phone calls (I swear i did not say one word about the weekend) Now that the week has progressed i am leaning towards the response from janniepeg, one that i had not given any thought to at all.....but i still am not totally convinced...consistency is the key here. We'll see
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your answers, lets see what happens this week!!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the feedback, both are good. I feel like the part about him being the least attractive person really stuck out, WOW. The funny thing is I am really attracted to him and the looks are not what its all about....for me anyway. I dont THINK that he is worried about his looks at all, he has more confidence in himself than i do myself. Dont think that he thinks he is really attractive, I dont think he thinks about it at all. He knows all the right things to say (which scares me) most men do not have the confidence to say some of the things he says to me. One thing i did not mention...this guy was sent to me at work because everyone else thinks he is an A**hole, I am very good at dealing with those types and usually get along well with them when no one else can. Everyone else in the office is scared of him but he is the sweetest guy to me in the world.... I did find out that he was upset over a work situation involving a coworkers mishandling of his transaction, when i spoke to him about it I calmed him down (so i thought) then the next thing you know he was taking his business elsewhere until i intervened. He did not want to act upset around me!!!!!WTF????
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (12 December 2010):
 Perhaps he knows he's unattractive and feels out of your league. He's testing if he doesn't contact you would you still wait for him. It's a bad feeling being with someone you think would be stolen away any day. So maybe he's indeed looking for a more mediocre woman in exchange for a more comfortable relationship. The best you can do is to tell him how much you like him, what you are looking for in a relationship at the same time without pressuring him for one. Some people are strikingly beautiful first time you meet them, while some gradually look better when you hang in there long enough, like their real personality shines from within. Who wants to be with a woman who thinks he's the least attractive of all? He probably sensed this and is worried that he will constantly be compared to your other exes. You can't help what you feel towards people's outer appearance but you can help him gain more confidence in himself, his accomplishments, his humor, his strength and his reliability.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): It could be that he has someone else. Being very attractive doesn't save you from getting cheated on. Why not ask him directly, in person, why you never see or hear from him at the weekends, and watch his face.
I'm sorry to put it so bluntly, but a similar thing happened to me and there was someone else, even though the man was much older than me.
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