A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Why must everyone I know that is in a relationship with someone constantly remind me of how single I am. Am I not miserable enough already. I swear that I'm being punished by god for some unknown future transgression.I'm in my mid 20's and never once has a woman ever been interested in me. I've never dated, kissed, or even so much as held hands with a girl let alone anything more than that. At 25 I should have had some experience with girls by now, but I feel as though I've missed some important waypoint in life that has labeled me unworthy or finding that special someone. I feel my inexperience is some dark secret that I have to hide away from the rest of the world just so I can look normal.The funny thing is that I'm told that I'm a good looking guy all the time. I can be kind of a quiet guy at times, though I'm really friendly and get along with most anyone. I have a college degree, stable job, and a good group of friends. Sounds pretty normal to me. I just don't get it. There must be something wrong that I just can't see.Most everyone I know is either married or in a long term relationship. I always feel like the odd one out or the third wheel when I'm around everyone. Even as I type I have to listen to my roommate and his girlfriend having sex in their room. I can only put up with it for so long before it's just another annoying reminder of what I can't have.It would be nice for once just to feel wanted and loved by someone other than just my parents. To know that there would be at least one person who would miss me if I didn't come home from my shift at the PD.Looking for whatever advice I can find. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm usually a really happy person, but this whole situation is really starting to bother me and get me down.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2011): There is nothing wrong with you, sweetheart.Many women would love to be with a man who didn't whore himself around in his teen and twenties years. Even more would love that you would be her one and only, and she would be yours. There is a woman out there who will love you for you, and will love you even more because you are a virgin.I gave my virginity to a guy who wasn't a virgin, and often have a lot of issues about it. I wish he would have waited. I wish I would have waited, perhaps even for someone who waited, like you. I think that is where ALL of our problems lie, the imbalance of sexual experience. Although now ti makes me sound like a hypocrite because I did after all have sex and not wait. But you get my idea.Don't let it get you down! You sound like a really nice guy, with successes and intellect. Women are drawn to a confident guy who is not afraid to be himself. So be yourself, do what YOU want to do, not what you think will get you girls or what will please others. Then you will find a woman who is worthy of your time. I truly believe that. That is how I met my guy. And he is great, it is not all about sexual past. Although I let it bother me much more than I should sometimes.You are still young. You have your whole life ahead of you. I think when the timing is right in your life you will find her, and you will be very happy. In the meantime be happy now, as you said! Life is a great gift!
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