A
male
 ,
*oyWonder2006
writes:ok i've been dateing my girlfriend 6 monthswere engaged, where trying for a baby, we spend as much time as possible with each over but i wanna move in with her and i asked her the other day if she wouldn't mind looking for somewhereshe got mad told me she will look when she wants to look and in the end we both agreed we would wait till we've been together 1 year before looking so i took this as a bad sign. so i told her the 4 nights we spend with each over doesnt work for me the way it did 2 months ago. i want more from her 5 nights a week but she as a big problem with spending 5 nights with me everytime i ask her " do u wanna spend 5 nights with me this week " all i get is " dunno " i kind of think if she loved me the way she says she loves me the answer sould be yes without thinking about it one bit.wat do u think?any help would be great
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female
reader, A Cappella  +, writes (29 May 2008):
 well, lots of people don't move in together until just before they marry, so I wouldn't worry about that. What concerns me is that you're "trying for a baby" but you don't ALREADY live together. Put the breaks on the baby until everything is settled, and good luck!
A
male
reader, A nice guy +, writes (28 May 2008):
What is your rush?
It has not been a year, and you want to live with her.
You do not know her! You have not seen her in the good times, in the bad times, during stress, and during the holidays. Have you met her parents and friends, and has she met yours? Is your life integrated, or do you live two separate lives with four booty-calls a week?
And speaking of booty-calls, why are you two trying to make a baby if you are not married (or at least living together)? Do you really think a little one will help you get to know her? It will not. It will only complicate things.
My opinion is simple, take your time and get to know her. Do not move in with her. Do not make a baby with her. And if she is putting up boundaries, respect them and stop badgering her.
Also, it sounds like you like her more than she likes you. If you withdraw a little bit, it will give her an opportunity to miss you.
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A
male
reader, cuninglingwist +, writes (3 September 2007):
I think she is doing some one ell,s besides you, but needs back up just incase she gets preg!by the other who is proberbly a dead beat, or married that carnt afford a kid.
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A
female
reader, auntyluuurve +, writes (3 September 2007):
 is it possible she has lived with another guy before and it went wrong?
i lived with my boyfriend for about 2 years, it went horrifically wrong. i am terrified of moving in with a guy now as it literally ripped my life apart. even if she hasnt moved in with a guy before perhaps she has heard how bad it can make things?
if shes showing you love and telling you she loves you then i dont see that there is a relationship problem. but if she is frosty towards you sometimes and you are the one who does more of the loving then i think we have pinpointed your problem - she has doubts and she probably wants more than what you are able to give.
youve only been together for 6 months. i think its far too soon for you to be trying for a baby and to be moving in together. respect her decision and please give yourselves at least 2 years together to find out if you really are compatible or just in the honeymoon stage.
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