A
female
age
30-35,
*riaz
writes:In my freshman year of college, I befriended a girl who I thought was a cool person. However, as we grew closer, I realized she was not a very cool person. She's a manipulative, selfish, immature, clingy/needy, bitch. She's told me some of the things she's done to people who have drifted apart from her (i.e. slashing someone's tires, keying someone's car, etc...) which made me afraid to sever ties with her. But I did eventually and she went nuts. She followed me at school, called me multiple times using multiple numbers, showed up at my workplace and at my house, keyed my car, left creepy notes on my car, etc... I had to get the police involved to scare her to stop harassing/stalking me. I changed my number and blocked her on all social media outlets. It was a nightmare.I forgave her for what she did to me and have moved on, and thought she did too.However, 3 years later, she was somehow unblocked from my facebook, and a few months ago, started contacting me again. I did not want to be rude, so I responded to her briefly before cutting her off. Over the past few months, she messages me occasionally asking me how I'm doing and trying to make conversation. I am very brief with her, and she can see that. She messaged me again yesterday and because I was very brief with her. She asked "am i bugging you?", to which I replied "Busy. at work" She then said "I thought you wouldn't want to talk to me after everything that's happened." I replied "that too" and blocked her, but not before she wrote "So you just wanna keep holding on to that"Why is she contacting me again? What is she trying to do? I don't get it.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 May 2015):
 She has her reasons for what she does... we don't know what they are... the truth is HER reasons don't matter.
YOU did the right thing. you blocked her.
however, instead of saying "busy at work" you should have said "you are bugging me and I do not wish contact with you"
give her some closure too.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (5 May 2015):
 Why ? Because she is NUTS, that's why - hasn't she proved it to you enough ? Do you need more ? ..
As far as what she wants to accomplish,.. who knows what goes through her disturbed mind. Probably in her head if she MAKES you pay attention to her and resume your relationship, she scores points, gets the one upmanship and wins a battle over you. But you do not really need to know, and I think it was a big mistake that you responded, although briefly, to her ouvertures. When you respond , you signal there's a possibility, an opening through where she can put her foot in again, while instead it should be clear that her past shenanigans totally disqualify her from any further attempts; that door must stay closed.
If you are worried about being " nice ", nice is not always mandatory. You would not worry about being nice to someone who has mugged you, or threatened you at gun point , or raped you, would you ? Now , I know that this poor girl has not done anything so serious to you,- yet, the fact remains that she still behaved in a way which legitimates you to dispose of any social niceties. She lost her right to that long time ago. Just block her all over again, do not respond to any of her attempts/ provocations - and, if necessary ( I hope not ! ) just involve the police once again.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 May 2015):
 I think she has mental issues FAR beyond what you know. And all you CAN do is KEEP the no contact. BLOCK her from social media, and DELETE her, check your privacy setting so SHE CAN'T contact you/find you or go through FRIENDS of yours to keep tabs on her.
Don't try and "figure" her out. She is nuts. For her this is a game. She likes to keep people on their toes, scared or what not of her, she doesn't care.
DO NOT talk or reply if she finds a way to contact you. JUST cut her off. YOU DO NOT owe her to be "nice". UNLESS you want more drama.
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