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age
26-29,
*
writes: I don't know what to do about my family. They constantly compare me to my sister and to other people not even related to us. I'm fine with being compared to people, that really doesn't bother me. However I've noticed my dad seems to like my sister's work more than mine.Now don't get me wrong, I understand that kids sometimes think their parents like their sibling over them, however he has always done this since I was born. Today was results day for our GCSEs and he came with me to get them, I showed him my results and couldn't believe how happy I was with them, they were all good but he didn't even give me so much as a well done. When we were leaving we ran into a friend and she announced she had A* in everything, my dad instantly turned to me as asked, "what did she do that you didn't? She put the work in that's what." I couldn't believe he had said that to me, I worked so hard to get the good grades I got and he just brushed them off as if they were rubbish. Only a week ago my sister showed him a piece of work she had done and he said it was brilliant even though she had gotten it wrong. I then showed him a piece of art work a few days later that I had worked on so hard and he told me everything I could do better on it and nothing good. His comments towards my work are always negative while my sister receives positive comments.I know he loves me the same as my sister but I don't understand why he is so negative about my work. Even my mum has commented and spoken to him, she said "you have to give her some positive feed back and show your support otherwise she'll think she's not good at anything". I know I shouldn't but I've started to take his comments to heart and my self esteem has plummeted dramatically, even my teachers have noticed and said I don't put the effort into my work that I used to. And I haven't lied to them. I've told them, "what's the point in trying when all you ever get is negative feed back?"I know it's not the way to look at things but I'm struggling to see it any other way.Can anyone shed some light on why he is doing this? Or perhaps what I can do? Any help would be grately appreciated. Thank you and sorry it was quite long.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (2 September 2011):
 Yeah being a parent is the toughest job on the face of this planet. I figure he's just trying to keep you focused and putting forth your best effort. You might want to let him know when he's hurt your feelings though.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you eyeswideopen, that helped me to understand him. It just puts me down when he does it even though I don't think he knows he's doing it quite as much as he is. So thank you.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (31 August 2011):
I know when bosses give employees an evaluation there ALWAYS has to be someplace that has room for improvement. Your Dad is making the mistake of negative criticism without the positive incentive that should accompany it. But my question to you is whether you are working just to please Dad and not working to please you. If you think you've done your best on a piece of work then that should be all that counts. You and only you know whether you really did try your very best and worked hard. This is your life you are building not Dad's.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionUh... thanks, but I don't think I can just get a new dad. Besides I love my dad and I know he loves me.
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (25 August 2011):
 Sounds to me like your Dad loves your Sister more than you. You need a new Dad....
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