A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:TDLR my boyfriend is suddenly completely indifferent about his ex after hearing she got engaged. What could be the reason for this sudden change of heart???Long version: My boyfriend found it extremely hard to let go of his ex. They didn't date for long but she had a good hold on him. I think it was quite situational at the time.he's a stronger person now. We have both grown a lot since we got together first. While he NEVER ever treated me like his second choice .... that hold his ex had him was there for two years of our three yeear relationship. He is not the type to wonder 'what if' and he is too logical so understood that being with someone like her would have made his miserable in the long term. I didn't jump on the 'dump him' train because I felt that we had a real connection. And time patience and a lot of horrendous arguments later... it is a mostly fabulous relationship now. It seemed to really turn a corner when I told him that his ex had just got engaged. There's an Xmas party every year that she sometimes goes to. She didn't go last year and this year my boyfriend told me that it's the first year where he genuinely does not care to see her. Before he always imagined a "screw you" scene in his head whereby his life is so much better than hers. (Her and her family treated him abysmally)My question is: Why did my boyfriend suddenly become indifferent about his ex? I mean I'm delighted of course but part if me wonders if it is because he knows he definitely will never get her back? Or could it be because she has joined the rat-race? He has GENUINE FEAR of this!!!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2015): Thanks for response. Just to clarify... the topic is never her persay, it was him not being over her and my fear of getting hurt.
Thanks I guess youre right Denizen... his feeling that way has faded! I look forward now to feeling relaxed about the whole thing!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2015): It's seems weird that you both are a little too over interested in his ex. She really shouldn't be a topic for discussion in your lives.
Maybe he's finally over her. Or maybe he's really hiding his emotions. Maybe he doesn't want to fight with you anymore over her.
Either way he's yours now so stop worrying about her and move forward.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (29 November 2015):
 It just sounds as if he has moved on. A large part of the process is forgiveness and, as you said, the 'screw you' mentality has faded out. This has been helped by her engagement. Some other poor guy now has to put up with her.
All in all I would say he is now clear to devote himself to you. Make the best of it.
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