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female
,
anonymous
writes: my boyfriend and i have beeen dating 22 months. i am ready for an engagement but he is dragging his feet. he tells me that when i get over two of the problems that he has with me...then he will move forward. the two problems that he has with me are: he says that i always want to be with him..never letting him out of my sight and also fearing that he will talk to his family about me behind my back. it is not true abount me not wanting to let him out of my sight. i know he has to work and i am funny about him going away with his friends for two to seven nights fishing. he goes to the mall and grocery store by his self and early on in our relationship he told his family all about our relationship and when i would do something wrong he would go and tell them about it. he says that marriage is complicated and this just gripes me to know end. he always does everything for everyone but me. don't misunderstand me, he is very, very good to me. he just won't get engaged. he keeps buying more time. he says in a month we probably will, then when that month get here, he will say that he is not ready to get married yet. please tell me some ways that I can get him to do what i want so much. thank you.
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female
reader, Toria +, writes (26 September 2006):
 There really isn't anything you can do to make him get engaged to you not only that don't you want him to marry you because he wants to and not because you have kind of pushed him into it in a way?
You need to start giving up on wanting this so bad as it will soon start getting in the way of your relationship until there isn't a relationship to take to the next stage, you need to just let things happen at the right pace for you both not just because it's what you want.
Whats more important, being with your boyfriend or marriage?
Good luck :o)
A
male
reader, Dr. Reality Check  +, writes (25 September 2006):
 That's slightly hypocritical. You wont do what he wants, as in staying unmarried a little while longer, but you end with 'please tell me some ways that I can get him to do what i want so much'. Let's face it, you've only been together less than 2 years, and he is obviously not ready to get married. Surely you would want to wait until you are BOTH ready to get married? Rushing him will only push him further away and make him question the relationship more. The fact that he's lying to you (him telling you maybe next month) isnt helping either. The best thing you can do is sit down and have an honest conversation, which, if you are ready enough for marriage, should be no problem.
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