A
female
age
26-29,
*aron's baby
writes:i have liked this guy 4 a long time and we recently started dating,we havent been 2gether a month yet,he said hes liked me a while as well..at 1st he would call me every nite and then we started spending alot of time 2gether(hes my neighbor)if he seen me outside he would wave or call and ask me 2 come over,well a few weeks ago he called me and ask me 2 come over,said he had a present 4 me so i went well it was a kiss,he told me that he had been wantin 2 kiss me but was afraid i didnt want him 2 and i told him i did,well we had kissed a few times and then one nite recently he frenched kissed me(it was my 1st time french kissing but not his 1st time)i told him he was my 1st french kiss and he said cool but he hasnt french kissed me since just a smooch every now and then ..we would usually walk in the evenings and one day i went walkin with him and a friend of his well my mom made me come in bc she said it didnt look right me walkin with 2 guys and he said he understood what my mom was saying..we still hung out some after the kiss and what my mom had said but not as much but the last time he has really spent time with me was last saturday,we had fun,we took alot of pictures 2gether and stuff but since then i see him out but he doesnt call or come over but we talk at school and stuff but yeserday he had a friend over at his house and he did call me 4 a few mins and he said he is sorry he hasnt came over lately and then about an hour later he and his friend knocked on the door and he asked me 2 come outside 4 a min and i did we talked a few mins then he left, 2day was his birthday and he told me that he wants 2 hang with his friends 4 his b-day and that he would call me later and we would hang out but he didnt call,he did walk by with his friend and i was on the porch and he whisled at me and waved..about a week ago an ex pushed me at school and he defended me and told the guy he better not touch his girl again..im so confused,idk if he wants 2 be with me or not..y is he doing this..plz help me figure this out!!
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (24 September 2009):
He's not sure what he wants young lady. I'm not sure he's really ready for a relationship to be honest. Keep your self respect and dont let him use you. End it and move on.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2009): Honey, I hate to break it to ya, but he don't know either!
There's the real poison of relationships. We all spend so much time second guessing ourselves, that by the time we figure out what we want, we can start second guessing whether or not that's what the other person wants. Once we figure that out, it's time to re-evaluate whether or not we really want what we thought we did, and the second guessing begins all over again!
Look honey, I don't care how cute he is, how much older he is, how hot he is, how confident he acts, how popular he is, how smart, achieved, athletic, or all of the above. He's a guy, in high school. He's full of hormones, self doubt, and has an ego as big as a mountain and as fragile as spun glass.
On some very deep levels, that he won't even admit to himself (let alone anyone else) he's afraid. He's afraid you won't like him, he's afraid you will, he's afraid he won't like you, he's afraid he will, he's afraid things might go too far, he's afraid they won't. I could continue, but I think you get the point.
He's just as confused as you are. It's called being an adolescent. I don't say this to sound patronizing, I can remember quite vividly how much that sucked. I would, however, tell you the following:
Things will get easier. It doesn't seem so now, but they will.
You will have some very much bigger problems on your hands in not so many years. Looking back, this will seem like small potatos.
Don't lose sight of your own self respect, self regard, or self control. This world we live in can be a very very cold, nasty place, and it has a bad habit of eating people your age without so much as noticing. Self control, and self respect are about the only defense we have against the worst the world can throw at us. Don't lose yours.
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