A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok, my boyfriend gave me the password to his email account about a couple of years ago to check something for him when he was out. I was boried the other day and I looked in his email account (I know i felt bad as soon as I did it). Well I found that hes been chatting to a girl on the other side of the world, it seems to be pretty inocent "how r u, hows work" but I also found that hes signed up to a dating website, in the past hes looked at dating sites with me present (some of the profiles can be funny) but still why is he signed up?. Well Im so confused, hes not cheating but why is he chatting to some random girl? He would be so pissed if I did that. So I know what I did was wrong but I dont know how to confront him about it. Any advice? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2009): As the saying goes you look and you will find! Well, I think I would worry more if the young lady was near instead of so far. Plus, I would as him questions like would you find the need to chat with someone else on line and see what response you get.
A
female
reader, shiraz *  +, writes (11 February 2009):
hiyah, well firstly ask yourself why you did this? if trust was there 100% you wouldnt of felt it necessary to look. but youve seen that and avoid this as the issue. your doubts were obviously there as you looked! it doesnt make you a bad person, were all guilty of the odd wondering but it just means that your relationship was already heading into a not so good place. most of it will of been before you and if any was private from that long ago he would not of given you the password knowing you could so easily come across it. if you want to confront him you have to be honest and up front. tell him what youve said, you know it was wrong you regret it now but your mind just wondered..only thing you can do is be honest and tell him the truth. learn from this, its always risky and you took that risk. dont be too quick to blame him until you know the facts. we all have a past that we sometimes forget in the heat of the new found future.best of luck xxx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2009): It is not a bad thing to randomly check his email. If he had your info he may do the same. You do have a little reason for concern. Why is he even chancing it and having small talk? Strange? Only because you don't want it to lead to anything serious. The point is he may be missing something.....figure out what you can do to nip it in the bud.
I wish you all the luck.
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