A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I have suddenly become desperate for hugs these past few weeks, when all my life I have hated hugging and avoided hugging people as much as I could. Even with family members. There’s not one person I can think of who I have enjoyed hugging in the past. I would only hug family members out of necessity e.g. departure or if they initiate it. I just never liked physical contact, even though nothing traumatic has happened that made me be so. I think it has just been my odd natural disposition. However I feel the need to comfort others so badly right now. I want others to come to me if they’re stressed and I just want to tell them that everything will be okay and that they’re safe with me and that I can give them a hug if they need one. I’ve been thinking about this towards a fair few people I’ve been encountering lately. E.g. At work (I’m a supermarket cashier), I’ve wondered a few times whether a customer was going through something rough, and if so, I’d imagine being there for them and hugging them. I really hope that’s not creepy or weird. Ugh. I have never been like this before.I don’t know, this is new to me, I’ve never craved hugs, especially not initiating hugs at all before (as I’ve already made clear). I feel like this is really weird/strange of my mind and body. The urge is just so strong. But it also feels kind of right, because I finally understand what it’s like to want and give hugs, which is natural human behaviour/desire? Sidenote, I have had irregular hormone levels since puberty (high testosterone), however as of late I’ve been really tuning into my body and stress levels like never before, so maybe that has a part to play in this? I would strongly appreciate if anyone had any thoughts on this.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2021): Oh my! Can I say at least one good thing has come out of this pandemic!
My dear, compassion springs from the must unexpected people at the most unexpected times. You needed a reason to open yourself up to extending warmth and comfort to people; otherwise, you've protected your space. It was in you all along, you just didn't feel the need to tap into it.
Surprise! You're a good-hearted, compassionate, loving individual! You do care about people, and you wish to do your part to bring comfort to others. Don't blame it on a hormonal-imbalance or some peculiar emotional anomaly.
It's called good old-fashioned kindness; and the natural need to connect with other human beings. The need to be a part of the whole, and not disconnected or isolated from humanity. You've had an epiphany, you've discovered you're a loving-person who also needs the comfort and affections of others. It's a little piece of God in all of us. It shows more in some than others. Don't suppress it, go with it, love!
A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (20 October 2021):
 Hi
I think these past two years with all the lockdown, and deaths from covid has changed a lot of people. I’ve noticed many people reaching out to others. It’s a good thing not weird. We all change as we grow , by the sounds of it you’ve grown into a compassionate and caring person. It feels good also to help others , even if it’s just a hug, a hug can make a huge difference to another’s day.
You’ve become empathetic towards others, maybe it’s a calling ? Maybe you could study counselling ? Either way it’s not weird at all , it shows the kindness in you.
Good luck and stay safe.
...............................
A
female
reader, Dear Mandy +, writes (20 October 2021):
Hi
I think these past two years with all the lockdown, and deaths from covid has changed a lot of people. I’ve noticed many people reaching out to others. It’s a good thing not weird. We all change as we grow , by the sounds of it you’ve grown into a compassionate and caring person. It feels good also to help others , even if it’s just a hug, a hug can make a huge difference to another’s day.
You’ve become empathetic towards others, maybe it’s a calling ? Maybe you could study counselling ? Either way it’s not weird at all , it shows the kindness in you.
Good luck and stay safe.
...............................
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