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female
age
,
anonymous
writes: I have a very tragic life story. Please give me some consolation,that I'm not alone. In my whole life,I tried to do my best,but the chain of partly unexplained unfortunate events,the whole thing became a nightmare. None of the things ,what happened, can be clearly traced back on my own actions, but the end result as a report card shows a very bad effort mark. My life looks like a never even tried it hard.I cant go into very concrete details , but briefly ,i can describe it,. Almost all 3 of my children in serious life trauma,since their early ages like starts around 10. Today it involves jail,institution,and instability on every level, including none has relationship with opposite sex in their 20 s.. My marriage,is in crises,and my health is frail. Life left me almost so crippled, that i can not understand it where did I go wrong, and what to do next. Some people thinks somebody jinxed me. Some other,specially family members that I m to blame for this. Im in therapy years ago, ad the therapist himself cant find the ''clue'' to such an outcome... My problem is I dont know who to blame for this life? How to move on? And what can you do with those who blame you for it senselessly? I know bad things happen, to everyone. But why all of them happens to me???Thanks very much for reading this.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2010): THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE ENCOURAGEMENT. FOR ALL OF YOU,
It is no longer a question to me,if it was all my fault, I know it was not. It is just impossible, because they are so many different things ,not only the children and relationship, but money and health ,and all accounts we have here in life is maxed out. It true, that no use of complaining,but some of have to go through hell ,right here on earth, and its always nicer to do that with compassion of others. Im no helpless, I deal with heaviness in my life, while I watching others effortlessly going through,even in crises. Their life turns around. Sometimes I see people,close to falling lower than me, but they come out again and again, and their fate turns around. I really have a good judgment on this. Im not saying ,Im the only one here to suffer. I just say, in this world where we live, and not in the unfortunate war zone. I'm never having the chance to see the light. I never know what is the next crises I have to deal with ,yet I have no more resource to deal with it. Everybody has a braking point. I think anybody,who would be in my situation, would wonder,why s this happening. But thanks very much to take the time and listen.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2010): Hi
I won't add to your feelings of despair by pouring sympathy over you not always a good move and just keeps a person in the same place. It sounds a very hard life, but you are still here to tell the tale, so you are surviving in some way. Blameis another bad move it resolves nothing really. You could maybe look at HOW you deal with the problems that have been, look at how you made the best out of really hard times, look at the stars instead of the mud.
My mother had a very hard life in many many different ways believe me,maybe even far worse than yours... wanting to end her own life when she could not understand WHY me???? Today my mother is the most beautiful woman inside and out.... she was on her knees in suffering years ago begging for it all to stop....her smile is the greatest gift that god GAVE US children and everyone she meets,she taught us the colour of life the spirit of a rainbow warrior never to crumble, blame ,accuse, deny , self pity, but to live and survive with the smile of a warrior through ANY hardships.
I wish you well in finding that :)
Spunky Monkey.
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A
female
reader, LiveAnnLearn  +, writes (10 September 2010):
 Without knowing all of the facts, I think I'm most likely right when I say that sometimes bad things like that simply happen and there's just no one to blame. Looking for an explanation or a reason you can't get is pointless and only causes you more unnecessary pain...
Yes, a lot of people are inclined to blame the parents for the way kids are raised, but there are just so many things that might have happened to them while growing up you weren't possibly able to protect them from - some people will blame you but you can't change it so try to ignore what they're saying and don't let it get to you at all.
Please try to take things as they are, focus on finding the positives in your life, be selfish if you have to, remember there's no use in crying over spilled milk, look after yourself and your heath 1st and try to make the most of your life working with what you have. Wishing you best of luck with that.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (10 September 2010):
 They say that bad things happen in 3's but I agree it's much more than that. Especially in your case...Without knowing the whole story and your vagueness all I can say is it's not a case of luck or karma coming around to bite you in the bum. Maybe you made a few bad decisions and it ruptured into a whole shit storm. Note, no matter how big or small the decisions one little false move and you can change the sequence of events immensely. I also think we can only control our life so much and the rest is decided for us, fate. The only thing I can suggest is continue with the therapy, get a few good luck charms, and maybe find your faith in God. Pray about it. All these bad events will give eventually and something good will come your way. You just have to have hope and some faith..it will come.
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