A
female
age
36-40,
*eezy41
writes:I was talking to this guy for 9 months. We argued after and hurt his feelings. He did not forgive me. Then i gave it a time. I did not text him for a while. All of a sudden, he texted me as if nothing happens for 2 weeks.He lives in San Diego and i live in NY. He told me he is on vacation for 2 weeks. He was planning to visit his fam, in NY. Then he changed his mind. The guy who texts me everyday, disappeared and o couldnt hear from him. I do not wanna text him and ask whats going on. He knows that i like him and expecting a relationship. I dont know why guys disappear all of a sudden?
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (14 January 2017):
 How do you move on?
Well, however you can? If you were ready to let him go when he dropped you LAST time, you can do it again. It might not be super easy, but really why give him this "power" to pop in and out of your life and feelings as he pleases? How is that good for you?
He might ALREADY have found someone else, someone closer.
He obviously isn't a great communicator and I don't think he cares as deeply for YOU as you have for him. If he thinks it's OK to not contact you AT ALL in 2 weeks it kind of shows a lack of involvement and/or manners and considerations... don't you agree? Especially if he OFFER NO explanations for being silent for 2 weeks.
You HAVE to decide if you are OK with a guy using you as a revolving door, coming and going as HE pleases. Entirely up to you what kind ot treatment you will allow.
A
female
reader, deezy41 +, writes (13 January 2017):
deezy41 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHoneypie:: how am i going to move on? I was ready to move on when he did not answer my texts and forgive me. Then he appeared and texted me nonstop. He might find another person.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (13 January 2017):
You might never know. That is the annoying thing about someone "ghosting" you.
I think the people who use "ghosting" are either afraid to hurt the other person's feelings by telling them that "this is not going to work out" OR they are just not very considerate people.
I mean WHO wouldn't call and CANCEL a dinner or a meeting for work? Of course, they would. It would be UNPROFESSIONAL to not call and cancel. So why no extend that courtesy to people they date? People they claim to have feelings for?
I'd still just BLOCK and DELETE and move on. I wouldn't want to be treated that way by another person. And certainly not by a person I had invested time, emotions and energy into.
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A
female
reader, deezy41 +, writes (13 January 2017):
deezy41 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe used to see each other every 2 months. He even called me on new years to celebrate it. He told me whenever i go to san diego, he will take me to this restaurant. Idk this time i was so nice to him and try not say anything that would hurt his feelings. But i just dont understand why he disappeared
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (13 January 2017):
I can be he wanted to HURT you back. Some people ARE that petty. That's a fact.
It can also be he is a flake, a total flake. And while he "claimed" he wanted a relationship.... he didn't try and met up with you in those first 9 months, did he? Or did you go to SF?
LONG distance I have noticed works best when people see each other (IN PERSON) on a regular basis.
I think YOUR best choice is to BLOCK and DELETE his number and move on. Find someone who is AT LEAST on the same coast as you. Someone you can spend time with IN person, someone you can get to know on a deeper level than through texting and phone calls.
This one is a dud. Move on.
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A
female
reader, [?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] +, writes (13 January 2017):
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png) You apologized and didn't intentionally mean to hurt his feelings. Not sure why he feels the need to distance himself from you. Maybe he is going through something traumatic that he's not letting you know about? LDR's are brutal not to mention the fact you are not sure what is going on in the other persons head.
But you shouldn't have to constantly wait either, I would ditch him before you feel like it's all you. This relationship isn't getting anywhere as far as I'm concerned.
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