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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Dear aunts and uncles,This is not a romantic relationship question, but I need help :)My boss wants to change some fundamentals we agreed on years ago and I need to find a delicate way to say no.I work for a minuscule company as a translator. Our work is completely internet-based. We don't have an office and don't need one. Everybody works from home, my boss, her business partner and our programmer (who lives overseas!). I made that deal for myself 4 years ago since I live far from the city center, where my bosses live (and my salary is a minimum wage that supposedly includes transport, but in reality it's not true... crazy European laws ;). This arrangement allows me to organize my own working hours and do some work on the side to complement my salary.However, my boss started feeling lonely and bored. I'm oversimplifying it maybe. She's extremely active even in her late sixties. She used to be a big-shot with busy schedules, meeting, business trips etc. She co-founded this company when she went to retirement and now is basically trying to recreate that feeling of business. (internet company was maybe a poor choice for her). She used to have several assistants, dozens of collaborators, maybe even hundred people to manage and now there's only me. She has no kids and her husband is like her, pushing 80 and staying late in the office everyday (his company has one). His son (from his second marriage), who is running the business now, told me that he is just playing along, helping his father put on a show. There's no need for him to spend his days and weekends in the office. In all truth there's no need for him at all. I went to work yesterday and just as I was leaving my boss' house she said that since a deadline is approaching I would need to come twice a week. (this sometimes happens, and if its for 2-3 weeks it's OK, even though it is completely unnecessary). Then she went on, how I should start coming more on a regular basis, because it's nice to share ideas (we talk everyday and exchange emails anyhow). I should have reacted but I didn't. Not just because I was in a hurry or because my boss was having guests. I never know how to react in these situations. I thought I would talk to her when I see her next week and underline what our agreement was and what it means to me. Any advice?Thank you so much in advance!
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (13 January 2017):
 You answered your own question, the best thing to do is have a friendly chat with her and tell her how it does not suit you but that you are always at the other end off the phone.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2017): Hey guys, thank you all for your answers!
Actually I DO have it in writing. It's clearly stipulated in my contract.
But I wouldn't want to use that. At least not straight away. I'd rather settle it nicely.
I'll tell her I see why she would want that and remind her why it is convenient for me :)
I just hate these misunderstandings... of well... better get used to them.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2017): I would start by just sitting down and talking to her. Explain that it will be difficult for you to come to her house 2 days a week and that it will obviously cost more in terms of transport. Explain that you expect to be paid more for this added time and inconvenience. I would think your employment contract probably sets out your normal place of work. If all else fails then I guess you will have to go in search of a new job.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (12 January 2017):
Unless you have your arrangement in writing, there is not much you can do.
However, Do not look at this as a bad thing. Your boss is getting up there, and maybe she is looking for a reliable replacement for herself.
Nonetheless, here is chance for you to learn as much from her as you can. Any part of the business that you do not know, and she does...LEARN IT.
It may not help you move up the ladder in that company, but you may learn something that could be of value in another company...which would land you better pay.
She is older and wiser...Get your eyes watching, ears listening, and brain processing and recording.
You see a problem, I an opportunity to increase your effectiveness.
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A
male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (12 January 2017):
 Essentially she is trying to change your contract of employment. That is not necessarily something that is written down. It is what you normally have done from when you first started.To give you an example, a practice nurse went to work for a GP. For the first three weeks he made her a cup of tea. The next week he asked her to make tea for him. She said 'no, that is your job'. And you know what? She was right. Her contract is what she was called on to do when she started. So I suggest sitting down with your boss and explaining that it isn't convenient but, perhaps there could be ways to work around it.It is at this point worth keeping a record of all conversations, communications, emails, and the rest, in case you need to go to ACAS. You might also want to leave your phone on 'record' when you have a meeting so you have a record of what is said. Then it isn't just your word against hers.At all times try to keep it civil. Be amenable but remember you have rights.Good luck
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (12 January 2017):
 WOW, What a complicated hot mess. If I were you(and I'm glad i'm not) I'd start looking for a new job. This is not going to end well so you need to get out of the way.
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